May 2026 – Zen and the Art of Vintage Guitar Photography

Prelude

HELLO THERE OR, IN ANCIENT ENGLISH PARLANCE, hail, what do ye, hwæt, wilcuma, godne dag, how fare ye, be thou healthy, and hāl. I thought I’d run out of pretentious greetings. Not this month. I will do my best to keep things simple for the rest of this tremendously tantalising tome. It also seems to me that a lengthy introduction is largely superfluous, so I’ll keep the preamble short and get onto the subject matter sooner rather than later for once. Wonders will cease… just not yet.

It seems that no‑one is taking heed of my passionate campaign for peace & love in the tortuous trials of 21st Century Earth, so I won’t waste any more time on it this month. It seems hate has conquered love, at least for now. Bad news for everyone. I won’t stop hoping for a better world, though, with or without people. For the sake of the 7.8 million (at least) other species that inhabit Earth, life without people would probably be a good thing.


This Month at CRAVE Guitars…

Altogether now, “Say cheese”! (NB. A phrase that first appeared in 1943, popularised by American ambassador to the Soviet Union, Joseph E. Davies (1876‑1958)). “Click!” Get the picture? This article – as signposted by the title – is dedicated to the ‘art’ of photographing vintage guitar gear. Predominantly, from the author’s perspective, that means guitars. I don’t do this from the position of a professional photographer and I don’t claim to have the skills required to produce world class photographs.

I have had an interest in photography (and art) since I was a teenager, some few decades ago now, and I am familiar with the basic principles. As a result, I am clearly not qualified to provide much in the way of hints and tips about how to do things better. This is therefore not an instruction manual! If you want a ‘how to’ guide, there are a few web sites that impart some of their dark secrets. I have no secrets (dark or otherwise), silver bullets (NB. a good thing) and no magic wand (Harry stole it). What I can do, though, is to relate my experience of photographing guitars over a number of years, and that alone may (or may not) prove insightful. As for the Zen bit of the article’s title, although photographing vintage guitars is essentially a practical application of repetitive technique, I approach creative outcomes with a certain meditative and philosophical frame of mind practiced in the here and now. I think.

I do this from the standpoint of a complete amateur trying his best to capture the visual essence of what makes vintage guitars visually so unique and desirable. For once, I’m not delving into the realm of playing guitars (I’m OK‑ishly proficient at best), neither am I exploring the sounds produced by guitars (I’m not obsessed with searching for the ‘holy grail’ of tone). This is primarily about their visual appearance. As you probably know, I enjoy the whole experience of vintage guitar gear to the point of obsession and addiction. Photographic imagery is my way to share this fascination with others. Personally, I see this as an important and integral part of my mission to spread the CRAVE Guitars’ word.

“There are no rules for good photographs, there are only good photographs” – Ansel Adams (1902‑1984)

A photo is just a photo, isn’t it? Photographing guitars is easy, right? One might think so. Guitars don’t have unpredictable human temperament (you don’t have to make them pose or smile) and they (generally) stay where you put them. There are no time constraints on any stage of the procedure (they don’t get tired or need cups of tea!). True on all three counts. As static photo models go, the methodology should prove smooth and stress‑free. As is so often the case, though, doing something well requires a bit more diligence than the basic notion might otherwise suggest.

While it may seem uncomplicated prima facie, photographing guitars well is actually not as straightforward as one might think. It’s not just a case of pointing a lens at them and the job is done. Nope. Nowhere close. To take photos with any sort of consistent competence requires time, effort and a modicum of acquired ability. To do it exceptionally, requires a highly proficient skillset (I can only assume that latter point, seeing as I cannot demonstrate such proficiency!). I believe my photographic ability lies somewhere along the continuum from hopeless to expert, probably in the area of basic competency and rudimentary adequacy. Quite possibly, my talents lie somewhere else altogether. Unfortunately, I can’t afford to pay for professional photos, so basic and rudimentary will have to do.

Despite the title of the article, this topic isn’t just about CRAVE Guitars, it is also about CRAVE Basses, CRAVE Effects and CRAVE Amps. However, it is the guitars that I am most familiar with and on which the main focus (sic!) of this article will be based.

As usual, no AI has been used for anything this month (other than the image of prehistoric Rock God that is The CRAVEman in his section near the end of the article). This month’s plentiful ‘quotes of wisdom’ are about the art of photography.

“What I like about photographs is that they capture a moment that’s gone forever, impossible to reproduce” – Karl Lagerfeld (1933‑2019)


The Rationale for the Article

Strangely, given the number of photographs I have used over the years to showcase CRAVE Guitars, I think this is the first time that I have ventured any opinion on the subject matter. It is time to change that apparent omission, methinks.

I have always enjoyed taking photographs right from my first Kodak Instamatic in the late 1960s up to my original Olympus OM‑2, a great go‑to 35mm SLR of the late 1970s and 1980s. I also took photography as part of an art foundation college course, also in the late 1970s, so I have a bit of history with it comes to taking pictures, even if only as a youthful enthusiastic lay person. Even then, my creative instincts always went beyond just taking casual point‑and‑shoot holiday snaps and I was always trying to see deeper into subject matter. The cost and inconvenience of film stock was always a limitation for me at the time. Digital photography has proved to be a revolution and a revelation, which has finally come of age. I have, in the past, used Sony and Nikon digital cameras to good effect, although I’ve never been a fan of Canon.

So… why look into the process of capturing the aesthetics of vintage guitars this month? The trigger came in feedback to a social media post of a headstock close up photo. The comment basically said, “I hadn’t noticed that in the photo of the whole guitar”. So, here we are, looking into that thought in more detail. This then led onto a series of more practical‑style close up photos of components that stood out for me. It was then a short step to thinking less about the guitars themselves and more about drawing out some of the elements that set vintage guitars apart from their modern counterparts. In effect, all I am doing is accentuating the expert industrial design that went into the creation of the instruments in the first place. I am just a middle‑man; the familiar archetypal designs have already been in existence for decades. I am just a mechanism for emphasising some of them for enjoyment.

“A great photograph is one that fully expresses what one feels, in the deepest sense, about what is being photographed” – Ansel Adams (1902‑1984)

I will state at this point that there are many, many people who take far, far better photographs than I will ever produce. However, that sad fact doesn’t prevent me from trying. My skills are very lacking and it is a frustrating exercise to produce something that I feel is barely adequate enough to share on social media and on the web site. I am not qualified or trained in the art, although I would have liked to have been. I am always keen to improve my ability, although not in a structured academic way. I like taking photographs of many things, not just guitars. I think I just about have a ‘good eye’ for images, developed more out of curiosity, rather than educated technique. I will say that taking good photographs comes from patience and persistence and has little or nothing to do with fancy photographic equipment. Good photo gear might make things easier though.

As far as I can tell, my first stab at photographing vintage guitars in a systematic way was in early c.2002 when I recorded ‘portraits’ of the guitars I had at the time, including ones that I have owned for the longest period (since c.1978), the 1975 Gibson Les Paul Standard and the 1977 Fender Stratocaster. The images predate my interest in vintage guitars and the formation of CRAVE (Cool & Rare American Vintage Electric) Guitars in mid‑2007. Here are the 2002 images, I think you’ll agree, things have moved along in the last quarter century…

At the time of writing, I do not have or use any professional photography equipment. The camera that I use is a humble iPhone, albeit the best that I can afford. My current ‘camera’ is an Apple iPhone 17 Pro Max, which I bought mainly for its camera capability, not for any other reason. To‑date, I have not supplemented the iPhone with any accessories or equipment to make the process easier or better. I currently only use natural light, as I don’t have access to any studio lighting equipment. The backdrops I use are what I have to hand – floorboards, a (too) small American flag and an old duvet cover (CRAVE’s go‑to purple satin background). I don’t have any fancy purpose‑built tripods, frames, stands, lights or backgrounds. I take hand held photos in the house’s run‑of‑the‑mill living space, nothing at all that could be described as specialised or fit‑for‑purpose. That’s it. Absolutely nothing exceptional. A lot can be achieved with everyday items and a bit of ingenuity. Photography definitely doesn’t have to be elitist and expensive in 2026. Thankfully.

“Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye” – Dorothy Parker (1893‑1967)

The key for me is to create a consistent, and hopefully, easily identifiable, look. The overall presentational style is all part of the carefully crafted CRAVE Guitars brand image with all the elements intended to work in synergy. I try hard not to do anything that diverges from the core ‘brand’. I have an image (sic!) to protect after all. At this point, I have to state that all CRAVE Guitars’ photographs are copyrighted with ‘all rights reserved’ and unauthorised use of them is prohibited. Take note image thieves.

The aim of CRAVE Guitars’ photography is not to produce lasting gallery‑worthy artistic images, to record newsworthy events or to generate income. Those won’t be my legacy. CRAVE Guitars’ aim is far more quotidian; partly to document the object and partly an attempt to convey some of the object’s physical characteristics in the best possible way. If this can be done in a visually attractive way, all the better. However, the patience and discipline needed to obtain the best image possible is a fundamental basis for both aesthetic and documentary photography. That doesn’t mean that one can’t have fun with reality and use a little creative expression to add ‘un soupçon du je ne sais quoi’ to complement the basic pictures once in a while.

“All the technique in the world doesn’t compensate for the inability to notice” – Elliott Erwitt (1928‑2023)


Some Basic Photographic Underpinnings

The word photography derives from the Greek, meaning ‘drawing of light’. The modern use of the word is widely attributed to English astronomer Sir John Herschel (1792‑1871) from 1839.

The very earliest form of image projection was the pinhole camera or camera obscura and may date as far back as the 4th Century BCE in both Greece and China. The camera obscura led to the development of lenses to control focus (image sharpness) and diaphragms to control aperture (amount of light entering the camera) in the 16th Century. The box‑type camera obscura was used as the basis for experimentation in the development of the first photographic cameras.

The photographic process depends on two basic steps; the first is to use a device to expose an image onto a light sensitive surface, while the second is to develop and fix (store) the image permanently. Those basics have held true from the earliest experiments to today’s technologically advanced digital cameras.

The earliest surviving photograph dates to 1826, captured by Nicéphore Niépce (1765‑1833) using a process called heliography. It was Louis Daguerre (1787‑1851) that developed the first commercially available photographic plate process, the daguerreotype. At the time, all images captured were monochrome. Photographic film became available from 1888, invented by George Eastman (1854‑1932). The first mass‑market Kodak Brownie camera appeared in 1901. Colour photography, invented by Auguste and Louis Lumière, was made commercially available in 1907. Colour slide film was introduced by Eastman Kodak with Kodachrome in 1935 and Ektachrome in the 1940s. Kodak discontinued slide film production in 2009 following the rise of digital photography.

While the first digital image was produced in 1920, digital photography really began with the development of the charge‑coupled device (CCD) invented at the Bell Laboratory in 1969. A CCD was used to capture images electronically and store the resulting file in computer memory. The CCD provided the archetype for today’s digital camera sensors, which now use active pixel sensors (APS) developed by Olympus. It wasn’t until 1986 that Kodak developed the first megapixel (one million pixel) solid state image sensors, with Nikon leading the innovation.

While CMOS (Complementary Metal Oxide Semiconductor) is the current sensor of choice (in 2026), the future of digital photography may lie in ultra‑high performance ‘gigajot’ QIS (Quanta Image Sensor) able to resolve down to a single photon of light.

Digital photography has led to global democratisation of electronic imagery in the 21st Century. An example of this is Google Images. It has also been a stimulus to so‑called ‘citizen journalism’ – ordinary individuals reporting news events to a mass audience without being a formal press journalist. Digital images are now the standard form of photographic process in 2026.

There are basically three general forms of professional photography:

  • Photojournalism – documenting important cultural, political and social stories and events for posterity
  • Commercial photography – marketable commissioned products for business and private clients
  • Art photography – translating an artist’s vision and creativity for aesthetic appreciation

There are plenty of sub‑genres of photography, many of which overlap and merge. Familiar examples include: portrait, wedding, landscape, wildlife, macro, abstract, street, travel, lifestyle, product, fashion, advertising, event and scientific photography, amongst many others. These sub‑genres are generally specific and exclude the whole raft of everyday family and holiday snaps. It is the diversity of styles that makes photography such a popular pastime for many people around the globe.

In addition to the professional types, the vast majority of photographs are taken by hobbyist amateurs and are generally for reminiscence and nostalgia, rather than for profitable or artistic ends. CRAVE Guitars photography probably fits in this broad catch‑all category. I do, however, try hard not to produce a multitude of below‑par run‑of‑the‑mill images. Any merit in CRAVE Guitars’ images is for others to judge.

Some of the world’s best spontaneous photographs that capture an ephemeral historical moment require the photographer to be in the right place at the right time with a camera always at the ready. Fortunately, CRAVE Guitars has the benefit of being able to control and choose every step of the process. And I still get to mess up!

“To photograph is to put on the same line of sight the head, the eye and the heart” – Henri Cartier‑Bresson (1908‑2004)


The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

THE GOOD is very easy to determine and I hope blindingly obvious – good subject matter. One thing I love about vintage guitars is that they are (mostly) just gorgeous objects as well as great musical instruments. When the items are amazingly beautiful vintage guitars, it makes things simpler and I strongly believe that the guitars themselves distract from any shortcomings in my ability to photograph them. I am pretty sure that many top photographers will attest to the importance of what is being photographed more than the tools used to capture them or the skill of the person pressing the shutter release. The only saving grace is that I now have some experience behind me, which has improved the outcomes over a considerable period since at least 2002. It is an incremental improvement and not always entirely successful. A ‘good eye’ can only get one so far without needing inspiration allied to technical ability and adequate equipment in order to excel.

A look at any of the relevant magazines and Internet sites shows what can be achieved. Most of what is out there, though, concentrates on showing new guitar gear in its best light (sic!) for marketing use. Vintage guitars, simply by their existence today, show their innate character, their idiosyncrasies and their scars of a lifetime of playing music. They are far from perfect – some seem relatively untouched while others are battered and bruised. To me that variety is part of their attraction.

No two vintage instruments are identical under scrutiny. I am not in the occupation of acquiring museum‑grade, sterile examples that are so valuable that one is too afraid to use them. I love the genuine articles showing their sometimes graceful and sometimes ungraceful, genuine aging (not the modern trend of fake ‘relic’ guitars). I have said it before (many times) and I’ll say it again. I believe in the Japanese concept of wabi sabi, that something can be, ‘perfect because of an object’s imperfections’. It is that quintessence that I’m trying to capture as much as their inherent design characteristics. The guitars themselves may not be able to tell any stories but they sure bear the signs of having lived as part of many stories.

Gallery of Acceptable Images – One for the ‘good’ pile. Just about. Each of these still have issues (note the crease in the American flag!) Sometimes things work out OK and the unadulterated image outcome is, well, OK. If the image ‘pops’ and flatters the guitar, then I’ll let it past quality control. They may still not be perfect (nothing is) but they are generally… OK.

Gallery of Acceptable Images

Gallery of Close Up Images – Seeing the whole guitar is one thing and is the main thing that people probably want to see most. However, sometimes, it is nice to pick out a detailed element of a guitar and make it into the main subject of a photograph. Sometimes, the details can prove fascinating and possibly overlooked within the context of the whole instrument.

Gallery of Close Up Images
Gallery of Close Up Images

“For me, the subject of the picture is always more important than the picture” – Diane Arbus (1923‑1971)

THE BAD is also relatively straightforward. Guitars are not the easiest of things to pose without it being blooming obvious that something is being used to position guitars in a way that makes the image capture easier. There are some accepted ways of showing guitars off, such as guitar hangers. These are OK but make a total mess of photographing the neck/headstock area or the instrument as a whole. Guitar stands have the same drawback, particularly getting in the way of guitar bodies. Try positioning most guitars horizontally such that the neck is not out of whack and see how tricky it is, especially so that there is nothing to make it look ‘wrong’. Even when the overall positioning is as good as one can get it, getting the right angles to photograph ‘bits’ of the guitar well can be a minefield. Try sketching a guitar at various angles and you’ll see how difficult it is to get the proportions and perspectives looking ‘right’. I would like to invent some form of contraption that could allow one to position a guitar accurately for photography while also not being visible. If there is a trick to this, I’ve missed it so far.

There are a couple of other considerations here. One is the use of natural light; one has to pick the right ‘quality’ of light. Dull but relatively bright is best to minimise intrusive contrast between highlights and shadows. Non-direct light sources generally scatter visible light photons better. Bright sunshine is too harsh for guitar photography. Too dark and the subtleties are lost. Another consideration is that ordinary shadows produced by things in the environment and/or the camera/photographer can intrude and aren’t always obvious. Sometimes, if there is a similarity of colour or contrast in the setting, the form of the object can be concealed, particularly in the darker areas. Not good when the shape of a guitar is important to the final composition. Sometimes, these things can be foreseen but sometimes it only becomes clear later on in the process. Necessary re‑shoots are a pain but inevitable.

Eagle‑eyed onlookers may spot some vintage dust in some images. I don’t have a problem with showing that these are used, played and, while well‑maintained, and are unashamed to be presented in that way. New guitars are, in my opinion, like new cars, overly pristine (yes, even the heinous ‘reliced’ instruments). “Hold the front page!” CRAVE Guitars are decades old and brandish their wear, tear, scars, flaws and tarnish proudly (even with specks of rust and dust). I’ve put this particular aspect under ‘bad’ for those who may see such blemishes as neglect and abuse. Not so. Such things are all part of their authentic vintage character, ageing naturally. It is also a bit of an intentional middle‑finger to the abhorrent ‘collecterati’ who demand perfection commensurate with their detestable dollar. Heck, people will pay good money for vintage dust!

“To me, photography is an art of observation. It’s about finding something interesting in an ordinary place…I’ve found it has little to do with the things you see and everything to do with the way you see them” – Elliott Erwitt (1928‑2023)

THE UGLY is probably the bane of all photographers attempting to make guitars look their best. Most guitars have glossy finishes or parts that reflect light. Yup, the one major thing that can make an otherwise OK photograph unusable is reflections. Given that I use natural light in an ordinary room using a hand held smart phone camera, reflections are, frankly, a complete pain in the ass. While one can try to minimise reflections (at best – they are hard to eradicate completely) using angles, it isn’t always possible without messing up the composition. Proportions can be thrown totally out – for instance ugly foreshortening or distorted angles/perspectives – all caused by just a small change in angle. Chrome or gold plated pickup covers and control plates can be a nightmare. One can quite easily miss an annoying reflection during a shoot, only to realise how bad it is afterwards. Reflections are generally of two types; one can be the light itself (bright highlights) or it can be other things in the room that get reflected in a finish. Sometimes, given my totally amateur approach, I just have to put up with some light/reflection anomalies. Look close enough at most CRAVE Guitars’ photographs and you can see lighting reflection problems. Most other things are easier to solve compared to this ugly and frustrating phenomenon. Once noticed, one cannot not see it. Non‑reflective and free‑standing gear like effect pedals and amplifiers are far easier to photograph.

Below are some montages brought together to demonstrate some of the things discussed above. As far as the ‘monstrosities’ are concerned, once spotted, one cannot unsee them and they crop up just about everywhere. For two of the examples, I’m showing ‘before’ and ‘after’ versions, so you can view the originals then they’ve been marked up to emphasise the (worst) issues, in true before & after, ‘spot the difference’ fashion.

Gallery of Monstrosities: Light Problems – This definitely falls into the ‘ugly’ category. Light is needed for photographs but light reflections should not encroach onto the subject such that it distracts the eye. I have ringed the problems, as if they aren’t already obvious.

Gallery of Monstrosities – Light Problems Before
Gallery of Monstrosities – Light Problems After

Gallery of Monstrosities: Dark Problems – Also definitely ‘ugly’. This is the close relative of light reflections. This time, it’s not light but objects of any sort, including backgrounds that are reflected and, again, intrude onto the subject and distract the eye. Again, ringed for emphasis.

Gallery of Monstrosities Dark Problems Before
Gallery of Monstrosities Dark Problems After

Gallery of Monstrosities: Contrast Problems – One for the ‘bad’. Sometimes, when trying to accentuate something, one ends up obscuring something else in the process. Over or under exposure can be interesting but it can also be highly irritating.

Gallery of Monstrosities Contrast Problems

“My ultimate goal is to try to make the ordinary look extraordinary” – Martin Parr (1952‑2025)


On a Technical Note

As mentioned above, a lot can be achieved with a little. Overcoming the hurdles of the good, the bad and the ugly is one thing. However, so far, everything has been up to the point of ‘pressing the shutter’ and the image is captured by the camera’s sensor. We are in the 21st Century and despite the enduring nostalgia for genuine film (now the pictorial equivalent of vinyl records), we are generally talking about digital photography here.

One of the huge advantages of digital photography is that one can take unlimited photos and review them instantly, discarding the obviously bad ones and retaining the best. Digital is also cheaper per image than film can ever be. Another big bonus of digital photography is that it makes exposure so much easier than in the old days. Things like automatic shutter speed, aperture, ISO sensitivity, depth‑of‑field, under/over exposure, etc. are less critical than they once were, making it harder for people to take a ‘bad’ photograph, at least as far as exposure goes. In this case electronic automation can be a blessing. It does, though, make it harder to raise the bar, which I endeavour, albeit falteringly, to achieve.

One thing that I have learned is to see (not look at) what needs to be incorporated and what needs to be omitted long before one picks up a camera (phone), which includes not only the objects in the frame (foreground and background) but also what is in the environment that can impact on the result. Once one learns to see and visualise the outcome, then that is the time to pick up the camera.

A great deal is made of camera sensor resolution. In reality, it isn’t just the number of megapixels that matter, it is the quality of the lenses, the way that the circuits process the image including things like focal length, dynamic range, image cropping, focusing, tracking, ‘shutter’ speed, contrast, sensitivity, noise, colour accuracy and compression. Digital zoom is just horrible, a good physical zoom lens is so much better. In old school 35mm photography a standard focal length lens is 50mm. Less than 50mm is wide angle, more than 50mm is telephoto. For guitar photography a slight telephoto focal length equivalent to 70‑80mm is ideal, essentially the same principle as for portrait photography.

Higher pixel count means larger file sizes, which can be an issue for social media and web pages. As things stand in 2026, a 12 megapixel image is more than good enough for general efficiency and efficacy. A 24 megapixel or higher image is better where fine detail and/or large image sizes matter. Unprocessed RAW images (so‑called digital negatives) are not a priority in this context unless one is aiming to produce professional standard results. As a rule, you can’t add in pixels that aren’t there in the first place, so it makes sense to adopt the best sensor resolution possible for the task at hand.

“If your pictures aren’t good enough, you’re not close enough” – Robert Capa (1913‑1954)


Post‑Processing

One unavoidable and essential aspect of the photographic process in the 21st Century is digitally altering an image after it has been taken. In the olden days, it used to be done in a darkroom with limited facilities for creativity. Digital post‑processing can be a wonderful creative tool. It can also be an image saver if some unforeseen artefact wasn’t picked up in the shoot. However, it can also easily be a potential disaster area in the making. Nowadays, many people snap lazy images and then spend hours using software in an attempt to recover something from a bad photo and, in some cases, they then go on to make it even worse! A central tenet of quality assurance is, ‘get it right first time, every time’ (GIRFTET). Adopting a GIRFTET method makes everything that follows much simpler. Such an approach reduces errors, improves quality and consistency, shortens process time, and enables continuous improvement.

Post‑processing, to me, falls into two broad categories; the first as a functional tool to fix minor errors and correct small artefacts, and the second as a creative tool to effect the whole image intentionally and to change it substantially from the original. One thing to consider, is that it is a very, very good idea to keep the original unaltered image and then work on a copy as, once an image has been bastardised, it can be very difficult to revert back. Keeping an original copy means one can easily start over if need be. Following a step‑by‑step methodology also helps – varying too much in one go is a recipe for a mess.

Once the image has been captured and stored, it can easily be transferred to a laptop and, if necessary, manipulated in photo/graphics software to make it more usable. Once again, I don’t have professional software to manage and/or manipulate digital images of guitars. Popular packages such as Adobe Photoshop or Corel PaintShop Pro are available to those who want to pursue post‑processing seriously. For me, I can’t justify the subscription investment in terms of either funds or training. I use simple ‘free’ graphics software called, Paint.net. It isn’t the most sophisticated toolkit but it does most of the basics well enough.

“It is an illusion that photos are made with the camera… they are made with the eye, heart, and head” – Henri Cartier‑Bresson (1908‑2004)

In the old days of film, darkroom manipulation required a whole extra level of skill, as well as the need for a dedicated darkroom facility along with the equipment, materials and chemicals needed. Image editing software means that a ‘laboratory’ is no longer a prerequisite for image production. Digital editing simplifies, speeds up and reduces the cost of preparing a digital image for sharing electronically. Thankfully, picking up the software skills are only costly in terms of time and tolerance. For an amateur like me, technological progress here has proved to be a wonderful thing.

There is, however, one fundamental issue that I have with the whole idea of digital image post‑processing and that is that it can often be seen and used as a cure‑all for bad photography and a temptation to mess around with an otherwise OK image. I am very firmly of the belief that the basic principle of ‘rubbish in/rubbish out’ applies. Take a good photograph and it should need a lot less manipulation after the fact. Take a bad photograph and no end of messing around with it is likely to improve it to a condition that is acceptable.

“No amount of toying with shades of print or with printing papers will transform a commonplace photograph into anything other than a commonplace photograph” – Bill Brandt (1904‑1983)

With a bit of practice, effective post‑processing can become second nature. At its simplest, this can be judicious cropping an image that is less than ideal in composition. Another learning point… cropping an image to improve composition can be rejected by social media platforms like Instagram, as it doesn’t like non‑standard aspect ratios. Editing can also prove useful in cleaning up tiny blemishes that might have been missed in the original photo shoot (usually cat fur in the CRAVE household!). However, coming back to ‘the ugly’ above, it is almost impossible to eradicate bad reflections effectively. Similarly, dealing with colour imbalance can be a nightmare, having to use software to manage contrast, brightness, hue, saturation, highlights/shadows, exposure, colour temperature, tint, hues, RGB, etc. It is very, very difficult to resolve fundamental issues unless one spends a great deal of time becoming proficient. Like many guitarists, I prefer to be playing guitars rather than fiddling around with the finer points of image editing software (and I have a professional background in IT as well!)

There are a lot of creative tools in image processing software these days. If the intention is not to create accurate images but to produce artistic effects, then image manipulation can be a great deal of fun. Sadly, I don’t have enough time to explore the full range of effects for CRAVE Guitars but there are some series where I push images to be pleasing to the eye rather than a forensic representation of the physical object. For instance, I do this for CRAVE Guitars’ Instagram series of images. I also use them for some close ups. Given the subject matter, creative effects are the exception, rather than the norm. At its simplest, creating a black & white or sepia version of a colour image is easy, as is adding a vignette or some sort of digital filter. It is preferable to do as much ‘in camera’ and as little in image editing as possible. I would like to do more in the way of creative ‘artistic interpretation’ one day.

Gallery of Post‑Processed ‘Creative’ Images – Sometimes it’s nice to play in the sandpit of digital image manipulation to create something that is perhaps more appealing to the eye than it is to catalogue and archive reality. This is where image editing software comes in. It isn’t a priority but it is something I’d like to explore more.

Gallery of Creative Images

Other things that I would like to experiment with is to create videos of the instruments to allow people to see them from different perspectives. Another thing that I would like to explore at some point is photogrammetry, using overlapping HD images to create a 3D digital model of the guitars. Both of these would add a complementary approach to standard 2D images. One of the drawbacks of making videos or 3D‑modelling is the aforementioned issue of posing the guitar without obstruction. Essentially, though, the sky is the limit, only constrained by practical considerations and lack of creative imagination on my part.

“Photography is a way of feeling, of touching, of loving. What you have caught on film is captured forever” – Aaron Siskind (1903‑1991)


Final Thoughts on Zen and the Art of Vintage Guitar Photography

My main effort as far as photography is concerned is to produce straightforward acceptable images for use on the website and on social media. That is the bulk of my activity. In addition to the stock CRAVE Guitars photographs with the familiar purple satin background I also produce other series of photographs that don’t appear on the website and only selectively on social media (e.g. ‘flag’ and ‘floorboard’ pics).

“If you don’t have anything to say, your photographs are not going to say much” – Gordon Parks (1912‑2006)

One of the reasons for documenting vintage guitar gear is to record them at a point in time for posterity and an attempt to represent the gear in the best way that I can in that moment. There are other benefits, such as security. In the event that something horrible should happen, for instance damage or theft, there will be plenty of detailed evidence of each and every item. It would be difficult to pass off any CRAVE Guitars without them being easy to identify from available proof of ownership.

Only some photographs make it onto the web site, the minority in fact. Many others are used only on social media. Some may only appear in articles such as this one. Plenty more, probably the majority, are never seen by anyone but me. Some are documentary evidence, some are unacceptable but good enough to keep as snaps, and some were just for convenience or experimentation.

As a typical Virgo star sign, I tend towards being a bit (?!) of a pedantic perfectionist. That is probably not a good trait for a documentary photographer, as I can always find fault with the outcome, which is highly infuriating. What others may think is absolutely fine, I see as a train wreck. Anything slightly off drives me crazy. For instance an alignment that is perhaps just a degree off horizontal when it shouldn’t be, a perspective with a vanishing point that is slightly off centre, an overly distorted foreshortening caused by a badly chosen focal length, or a distracting artefact. Out of focus images and/or poor depth of field are also particular bugbears. Ggrr. Argh. For my sanity, sometimes I have to post a photograph that I wouldn’t otherwise accept.

Regular readers will be aware of my long‑standing aspiration to turn the house’s cold, damp, dark cellar into a CRAVE Cave for the vintage gear. Part of that ambition would be a dedicated studio photography area. There are no windows, so no unsightly light aberrations.

So, in an ideal world, what would be my ideal photography set up? Well, I’d start with a decent full frame mirrorless camera with a decent tripod. I would employ professional backdrops on a dedicated frame. I would use a variety of stand‑mounted studio lights from direct lighting, soft boxes, reflectors, ring lights, etc., suitable for static as well as video photography. In addition, some sort of support(s) for positioning/manoeuvring guitars. I would also go for some quality photo/image processing software. Ultimately, though, these are just tools and, being pragmatic, I cannot justify the cost or space. They wouldn’t necessarily make the photographs any better but they could make my life an awful lot easier. As long as it doesn’t distract from the whole point of CRAVE Guitars, of course.

“Photography helps people to see” – Berenice Abbott (1898‑1991)

As seems to be the case, frustratingly, I have ambitions that extend way beyond my ability to realise them. However, that doesn’t prevent me from trying to improve my skills to showcase CRAVE Guitars’ vintage gear. I will continue to display the ‘collection’ to the best of my ability so that I can share with anyone who might have a similar obsession with these wonderful objects made of wood, plastic and metal. As ‘they’ say, ‘beauty, is in the eye of the beholder’ and ‘truth’ is therefore subjective. Oh, and do not believe anyone who suggests that, ‘the camera cannot lie’. It most certainly can.

So far, I have set things out as a technical, linear process without any emotional component. Firstly, I like looking at things, hopefully in a slightly different way from most people. Secondly, I like taking photographs of things that appeal to me; vintage guitars definitely fall into that category. Thirdly, I like sharing my passion with others and images are the primary vehicle that I use for doing so. As the saying goes, ‘A picture is worth a thousand words’ (NB. The origins of the phrase are unclear but can be traced back to several different sources between c.1911 and 1921, probably drawn from earlier, similar sentiments, meaning that complex ideas can be conveyed by an image more effectively than by a lengthy narrative description). I hope that the notion of an emotional attachment comes through not only in the pictures but also in the words that support them. Photography should be an enjoyable experience and the outcomes satisfying. If it isn’t pleasurable, it probably isn’t worth doing.

For once, I have left behind the sounds and playability of vintage guitar gear, at least for this article. That doesn’t mean that playing them and making music with them is of less significance than their looks. The aesthetic appeal is just one aspect of vintage guitar gear and it is the one way in which I can articulate my passion. Visual appeal is therefore quite an important and integral component of vintage guitar heritage. Another point is that this isn’t just about nostalgia or reminiscence, it is about a practical way of keeping these aging relics of a bygone age relevant in the modern world. Images are used to show how vintage guitars are right now, complete with all their untold back stories. They have lived many decades already and they will live many, many more, hopefully. Long after I’ve gone to that darkroom in the sky. CRAVE Guitars is, after all, just a temporary steward in their long journey.

“The camera is an instrument that teaches people how to see without a camera” – Dorothea Lange (1895‑1965)

I am a vintage guitar enthusiast first and foremost, not a photographer. The instruments are my priority. I do not think and do not imply that I am a good photographer from whom something valuable can be gleaned. I make no pretentions or claims to competence and my images, I believe, are testament to that lack of skill. My ability cannot be compared with most professional photographers, yet alone the masters of the trade. My photographs will never be revered as art but that is not what is important. However, it is an essential way for me to look and to see what it is that I am so passionate about and then to use images to tell a bit of their story to others. Ultimately, it is the vintage guitar gear that matters, not my ability or equipment; it is the beauty of the subject that, to my eye, needs to revealed and communicated.

One thing I have learnt more than anything else from feedback is an adaptation of that old adage, ‘you can’t please all the people all the time’. Share photos of the full guitars, people ask for close up images and vice versa. Share photos with some creative post‑processing and people ask for straight images. Share AI images and they want real photos. Share standard photos and they want to see/hear the vintage gear. Share something not on the web site and people say they want images already available. I try to do all of the above and people still find a way to disapprove, often vociferously, such is the toxic nature of unsocial media. Sheesh! One cannot win. It is also one of the reasons that I think social media is a necessary evil to be tolerated, rather than enjoyed. Why can’t people engage harmoniously with a contemporary community of like‑minded individuals? I have now decided to share what I want to post photographically and if people don’t like it, well, they know what they can do! Yup, look elsewhere.

“You can fool of the people all of the time, you can fool all of the people some of the time, but you can’t fool all of the people all of the time” – attributed to various including John Lydgate, Abraham Lincoln and PT Barnum

Just a word on the matter of Artificial Intelligence (AI) which, by all accounts, is the next ‘Big Thing’ that will apparently permeate all parts of our paltry presence. I am reasonably technologically‑minded and I can see both the potential benefits and potential risks of AI. I am no Luddite in that respect. AI will continue to mature in the same way that the Internet did. I think I’m on safe ground in saying that AI will find increasing traction in photography, both in digital camera electronics and in post‑processing image editing software as well as web site creation and social media. I predict that AI will ultimately result in a compromise of both good and bad, as with any other paradigm shift in human technological progress.

Oh, by the way, don’t forget that, in addition to the feature pages, there is a whole menu of picture galleries to be found on the CRAVE Guitars web site by following the link below (opens in a new browser tab):

Link: CRAVE Guitars Picture Galleries

Do I have a favourite CRAVE Guitars photograph? Tricky one that. I would have chosen an image of the stunningly beautiful 1963 Gibson ES‑330 but that had dark reflection aberrations of the sort indicated above. Then I thought of the 1968 Gibson SG Standard, the 1983 Gibson Explorer CMT. Almost there but not quite. There was the 1965 Fender Jaguar, the 1962 National Glenwood 95, the 1962 Gretsch 6120 DC Chet Atkins and the 1972 Fender Mustang Competition, even better. In the end I selected the 1972 Fender Telecaster Thinline ‘floorboard’ image. It is not on the website and I’ve only used it once on social media, so you might have missed it. The Thinline is a beautiful guitar captured in an OK image. A 100% original picture with zero post‑processing. So… here it is for your delectation. Perhaps I could have saved over 8,620 words after all.

OK. How about a least favourite? One image that shows just about every bad thing about a guitar image. There are (sadly) so many examples of rubbish photography but this one (actually on the web site!) is clearly demonstrating a job done badly. Sadly, it is only one of many. Not one’s best moment, I am embarrassed to say. Dear, oh dear.

If I do have any final words of advice about photographing vintage guitars, they would be twofold; a) A good eye is better than good equipment and, b) To produce consistently good images requires a great deal of perseverance, patience and a concentration on the subject matter. Nothing else matters. The following quote is testament to that from someone far wiser than me.

“Your first 10,000 photographs are your worst” – Henri Cartier‑Bresson (1908‑2004)


Photographs in Music

As a bit of a tenuous link to musicology, photographs and photography have appeared in many songs by well‑known artists over the years, including the 20 below, amongst many others (in no particular order):

  • The Cure – Pictures of You
  • A Flock Of Seagulls – Wishing (If I Had A Photograph Of You)
  • Blondie – Picture This
  • Duran Duran – Girls on Film
  • R.E.M. – Camera
  • Depeche Mode – Photographic
  • J. Geils Band – Centerfold
  • Neil Young – Distant Camera
  • Death Cab For Cutie – Photobooth
  • Wilco – Kamera
  • Frank Turner – Polaroid Picture
  • Johnny Cash – Send a Picture Of Mother
  • Ed Sheeran – Photograph
  • Taylor Swift – Picture to Burn
  • Keith Urban – Polaroid
  • P!nk – Family Portrait
  • Ringo Star – Photograph
  • Paul Simon – Kodachrome
  • Def Leppard – Photograph
  • Nickelback – Photograph

“Only photograph what you love” – Tim Walker (1970‑)


The CRAVEman as Prehistoric Photographer

As seems to be becoming commonplace these days, The CRAVEman has to get his fearsome Stone Age mug into the show somehow. Here he is trying his best to capture images of his precious prehistoric guitar collection, despite the (hopefully obvious) challenges. He may get the hang of it in a few thousand years’ time!

Useless fact of the month: As a prehistoric individual, The CRAVEman attempts to grapple with the technology of a Victorian bellows camera. He hasn’t yet grasped the concept of flash photography – originally using a carefully measured chemical flash powder comprising a mixture of magnesium and potassium chlorate, placed on a tray and ignited to produce a bright flash. Now we use LED flash guns. Thankfully.

“You don’t take a photograph, you make it” – Ansel Adams (1902‑1984)


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’

There is no real connection between this month’s article content and this month’s album selection, so there is no point in trying to justify any sort of questionably vague link between the two. This time around, just for the joy of it, I thought I’d go for something a little different. This month’s accolade goes to…

David Bowie – Let’s Dance (1983): Let’s Dance was David Bowie’s 15th studio album released in April 1983 on the EMI record label. The album was co‑produced by David Bowie and Nile Rodgers. Bowie’s previous album, ‘Scary Monsters (and Super Creeps)’ (1980) was a hard act to follow. Typical of the Thin White Duke, he didn’t regurgitate more of the same. Oh no. A total musical transformation and a new image were well up with the prevailing zeitgeist of the time. The album comprised 8 tracks, coming in at just under 40 minutes. Four of those tracks were released as commercial hit singles, ‘Let’s Dance’, ‘China Girl’, ‘Modern Love’ and ‘Without You’, helped to a significant degree by frequent rotation on MTV’s stylised music video coverage at the time.

Bowie was never one to shy away from an unlikely creative transformation. Let’s Dance (the album) received a mixed reception and many found it difficult to categorise at the time, especially as it was a departure from what people expected from a Bowie album. Musicians included several members from Nile Rodgers’ Chic and guitar work from one Stevie Ray Vaughan. The album was toured globally in 1983 as the Serious Moonlight tour. I was fortunate to attend one such concert at the Milton Keynes Bowl in Buckinghamshire, England in 1983. The massive success of Let’s Dance was followed by a creative anti‑climax in David Bowie’s output for many years and nothing subsequently matched the commercial success of Let’s Dance.

When thinking about the staggering legacy left by the late David Robert Jones (real name, 1947‑2016), ‘Let’s Dance’ may not be amongst many people’s top albums. There are way too many excellent Bowie albums to pick just one to stand head and shoulders above the rest. The rationale for choosing ‘Let’s Dance’ is simply that it is an easy listen and, on the whole, very accessible and emotionally buoyant – making it an enjoyable musical experience. RIP Ziggy Stardust, a.k.a. Mr. David Bowie.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“To photograph truthfully and effectively is to see beneath the surfaces” – Ansel Adams (1902‑1984)


Tailpiece

Well, that was a bit of an epic journey, far longer than I thought it would be. As mentioned at the beginning of this article, I can’t believe that it has taken over 100 blog posts over almost twelve years to get around to the subject of vintage guitar gear photography. When the epiphany occurred, it was a relatively easy topic to cover. I hope that there was something illuminating (sic!) for you to enjoy. I will persevere to improve my photographic skills.

“One should really use the camera as though tomorrow you’d be stricken blind” – Dorothy Lange (1895‑1965)

For once, I already have an idea for the topic(s) for next month. I just have to put finger to keyboard to compose something that will make sense. I hope you’ll return to find out what I’m planning. Let’s hope there is still a habitable world in which such an editorial can be brought to fruition.

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. The CRAVEman, signing off for now. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “Music is like essential life blood with the heart providing the rhythm, the brain providing the melody, the blood vessels providing the arrangement and the blood cells providing the individual notes. A perfectly balanced system in synergy, created over aeons”

© 2026 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


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April 2026 – CRAVE Island Castaway Part II: Music Playlist

Prelude

HEY UP PEEPS. HOW DO? SUP? WHAT’S COOKIN’? HOWDY PARTNERS. Super salutations! I come in peace. It seems unbelievable but we are already one third of the way through 2026 already. I trust you enjoyed the Easter celebration early in April as a harbinger of spring with lighter evenings and warmer days. Despite all the media‑fuelled doom and gloom, there is still plenty to look forward to in 2026. Let’s make this year better than its predecessors. There is no better time than the present. If one thinks about it, the present is all we have. The future we can hope for. As Nike say, ‘Just Do It’ (NB. From the company’s advertising campaign 1988‑1998).

“My childhood did not prepare me for the fact that the world is full of cruel and bitter things” – Julius Robert Oppenheimer (1904‑1967)

Regular readers will know my unwavering calls for comprehensive concord. I cannot emphasise enough that peace should be a profound ambition for everyone on this one and only planet of ours. Peace is not optional. Without it, humanity will ultimately be doomed. With it, we may just stand a chance. Personally, I hope we stand a chance but that requires significant change. We have to change. Peace matters, probably more than anything else for civilisation’s survival and advancement. This is not political, religious or even humanitarian, it is just plain old common sense.

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace” – Jimi Hendrix (1942‑1970)


This Month at CRAVE Guitars…

Back to more prosaic matters. I haven’t written much on musicology recently, so I thought I’d return to the subject this month. As this isn’t my first rodeo, I thought a quick recap on what has gone before might be in order. I compiled a, ‘Personal Top 20 Most Influential Guitar Albums’ way back in 2016 and ‘50 Albums of the Last Half‑Century(‑ish)’ in 2017. I also covered ‘The Story of Modern Music…’ in 14 parts from March 2019 to May 2020 (bar December 2019). In addition, there have been four major CRAVE Guitars genre articles (‘Dub Reggae Revelation’, ‘Adventures in Ambient’, ‘Heavy Metal’ and ‘Get Up and Dance to the Music!’) in 2023 and 2024. Last but not least, there was the article, ‘Musical Machinations’ in 2023 about access to music, so there is already a great deal of foundation to work from for this particular article. Time to take an alternative perspective.

“If music be the food of love, play on, give me excess of it; that surfeiting, the appetite may sicken, and so die” – William Shakespeare (1564‑1616)

This month’s piece is definitely another one for the list‑o‑philes out there. I must re‑stress as usual that this is entirely for entertainment purposes only and has no intrinsic value beyond mild amusement for both author and reader. As usual, no AI has been used in researching and writing this article, just hard brain work. The CRAVEman images, however, are AI generated out of necessity. This month’s quotes are a relevant mix of islandic observations and musical wisdom.

“We live on an island surrounded by a sea of ignorance. As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance” – John Archibald Wheeler (1911‑2008)


The Rationale for the Article

Last month, in Part I of this two‑parter, I looked at what 10 pieces of vintage guitar gear that I might like to take with me to CRAVE Island. This month, I contemplate as to what playlist of music tracks one might like to listen to, when not playing vintage guitars, on the very same secluded idyll of CRAVE Island. As last month, The CRAVEman has been used to introduce and present this month’s line‑up. If you want serious vintage guitar topics, why not head off to the web site proper or watch this space for the next non‑fiction article.

IF you want to (re‑)visit Part I of this CRAVE Island extravaganza, follow the link below (opens a new browser tab)…

March 2026 – CRAVE Island Castaway Part I: Vintage Gear

For readers who may not be familiar with the concept, the format used here is loosely based on the long‑running BBC Radio 4 programme, ‘Desert Island Discs’. Guests on the show select eight audio recordings (usually music), one book and one luxury item that they would have with them if they were to become a castaway, stranded on the metaphorical desert island. The BBC radio programme was first broadcast in January 1942 (that is 84 years ago in 2026!) and there have subsequently been nearly 3,500 episodes and counting. I depart from the archetype but retain the spirit of the original programme.

“After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music” – Aldous Huxley (1894‑1963)

Now, here’s a thing… I started off this idea thinking about what might constitute a ‘perfect’ pop song, in the knowledge that there is no such thing. The two exemplars that immediately sprang to mind and started this whole shebang were, ‘Blur – Song 2’ and ‘Blondie – Hanging on the Telephone’. Then it sort of ran away from me at that point, and here we are now.

How far does one go? Top 10, top 20, top 30, top 50, top 100 and so forth. What to include, what to leave out? Does one go by merit or popularity? Does one go with sales or star status? Does one go by genre or gender? Does one go with vocals or instrumentals, groups or solo artists? Does one go with guitar‑centric or electronic? Does one go pure pop or not? Does one go with singles or album tracks? Does one go with personal preference or industry reputation? Does one go with British/American or global? My‑oh‑my, I had started something that was just gonna blow my brain or at least make it hurt a bit. What a conundrum. What a dilemma. How on Earth does one go about manoeuvring safely through this massive musical minefield?

Selecting such a small sample of just eight tracks of music to play on a desert island simply wouldn’t be enough for The CRAVEman. Even 100 would be cutting it thin but a ceiling has to be set somewhere. Despite the immense volume of available music (running into hundreds of millions on streaming platforms!), I’m always searching for ‘new’ music to listen to, so this was a challenging task. One presumes, at least for this exercise, that The CRAVEman doesn’t have access to Apple Music (or an alternative) while on CRAVE Island.

“I’ve been asked over the years to compile a list of desert‑island discs. I couldn’t do that. If I was trapped on a desert island, I don’t think I’d want 10 songs to bring with me” – John Lydon (1956‑)


Defining the Selection Process

So, initially, one has to determine scale and scope. First – put an absolute limit on the list. Easily sorted, 100 it is. Second – come up with a set of ten sensible criteria through which one can select/eliminate a whole bunch of stuff (see below). Third – work on my own fallible subjectivity – it is my wish list after all. I abhor the idea of people including things just because they are ‘worthy’, rather than pleasurable (Oscar, take note!). Fourth – present it in a way that makes sense without being too arbitrary or confusing. That, on the surface, seems a sensible approach. Let’s see what the process came up with.

I decided from the start not to utilise any sort of ranking; selecting is one thing, ranking is a nightmare. I am 100% certain that readers will disagree with both the process and the outcome. However, it’s my article, so you can make up your own rules/lists to compensate for my perceived shortcomings and omissions.

“And those who were seen dancing, were thought to be insane, by those who could not hear the music” – Friedrich Nietzsche (1844‑1900)

In order to generate a diverse playlist, the main criteria used were:

  1. Only one track per artist
  2. A wide spread of genres
  3. A wide spread of decades/years
  4. A mix of singles and album tracks
  5. No dependence on commercial sales numbers
  6. No reliance on industry structure, record labels or marketing
  7. Not just the BIG names or celebrity status
  8. Ignore others’ opinions of ‘best’, ‘essential’ or ‘quality’
  9. No geographical restrictions
  10. No ‘novelty’ songs

“Let’s hope I never end up on a deserted island, because I could never make a decision on which three CDs to take with me” – Willem Dafoe (1955‑)

As it worked out, the date range covered the 1960s to the 2010s inclusive. Six decades seems a helpful bracket for evaluating contemporary music and one that has been used before. The most frequent decades were the 1970s to the 1990s inclusive. This is perhaps because I was too young to appreciate fully the rock & roll (and earlier) era(s) and because I am too old (!?) to appreciate the most recent musical trends… or perhaps these were the peak decades for creative modern music.

“Music is a moral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything” – Plato (c.428‑348BCE)

Now… 100 songs seems almost too easy and not in the real spirit of a ‘Desert Island Disc’ playlist, especially as last month the ‘Desert Island Vintage Guitar Gear’ was limited to just 10 items. In order to placate and pre‑empt that easy criticism, I have emboldened a ‘top 10’. If I was forced to choose, those are the ones I could most easily live with in the spirit of the article. It isn’t enough, of course, but this is just a hypothetical exercise after all. I also assume that the music is available on physical media, as Internet connection may prove particularly problematic on CRAVE Island.

Alternatively, if I could take anything with me to CRAVE Island, it would be my entire collection of reggae music but that now comprises at least a couple of thousand albums, so I don’t think it will be allowed to make the trip. Why reggae? The genre is so rich and diverse that there is always something different to appreciate, depending on mood. There, that is my underlying bias declared for your scrutiny. Oh, and reggae suits the hypothetical location well.

“A bird, music and food – desert island items” – Michael Johnson (1967‑)

To avoid the debatable value of ranking, I’ve gone for a chronological approach. Where there is more than one song from a year, they are presented in alphabetic order. Time for the waffle to end, let’s dive straight in and take a retrospective musical swim…


The CRAVEman’s ‘Top 100/10’ CRAVE Island Playlist

The 1960s (7):

Ben E. King

Stand by Me

1961

Del Shannon

Runaway

1961

Louis Armstrong

What a Wonderful World

1967

Velvet Underground

Venus in Furs

1967

Captain Beefheart And His Magic Band

Dropout Boogie

1967

Jimi Hendrix

All Along the Watchtower

1968

Fleetwood Mac

Albatross

1969

The 1970s (30):

Black Sabbath

Paranoid

1970

James Brown

Get Up (I Feel Like Being A) Sex Machine

1970

Neil Young

After the Gold Rush

1970

The Doors

Riders on the Storm

1971

Pink Floyd

Echoes

1971

Johnny Nash

I Can See Clearly Now

1972

T.Rex

20th Century Boy

1973

The Isley Brothers

Summer Breeze

1974

Rolling Stones

It’s Only Rock ‘n Roll (But I Like It)

1974

Bob Dylan

Hurricane

1974

Bob Marley & the Wailers

No Woman, No Cry (full live version)

1975

Roberta Flack

The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

1975

Max Romeo

War Ina Babylon

1976

David Bowie

Heroes

1977

John Martyn

Small Hours

1977

Patti Smith

Because the Night

1977

Sex Pistols

Pretty Vacant

1977

The Stranglers

Peaches

1977

The Undertones

Teenage Kicks

1977

Blondie

Hanging on the Telephone

1978

Buzzcocks

Ever Fallen in Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t’ve)

1978

Dire Straits

Sultans of Swing

1978

Funkadelic

One Nation Under a Groove

1978

Kraftwerk

The Model

1978

Lee “Scratch” Perry

Roast Fish & Cornbread

1978

Steel Pulse

Klu Klux Klan

1978

Bauhaus

Bela Lugosi’s Dead

1979

The Clash

London Calling

1979

Joy Division

She’s Lost Control

1979

The Ruts

Babylon’s Burning

1979

The 1980s (22):

The Brothers Johnson

Stomp!

1980

Motörhead

Ace of Spades

1980

Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark (OMD)

Enola Gay

1980

Talking Heads

Listening Wind

1980

The Specials

Too Much Too Young

1980

Siouxsie And The Banshees

Spellbound

1981

The Teardrop Explodes

Reward

1981

George Thorogood

Bad to the Bone

1982

Gregory Isaacs

Night Nurse

1982

Robert Wyatt

Shipbuilding

1982

Rockers Revenge

Walking on Sunshine

1982

New Order

Blue Monday

1983

Public Image Ltd

This Is Not a Love Song

1983

ZZ Top

Bad Girl

1983

Pet Shop Boys

West End Girls

1984

Echo & The Bunnymen

People Are Strange

1988

Happy Mondays

W.F.L. (Wrote For Luck)

1988

Cowboy Junkies

Blue Moon Revisited (Song for Elvis)

1988

Transvision Vamp

I Want Your Love

1988

The Beloved

The Sun Rising

1989

The Cure

Love Song

1989

Stone Roses

Fool’s Gold

1989

The 1990s (26):

Depeche Mode

Enjoy the Silence

1990

Orbital

Satan

1990

DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince

Summertime

1991

Nirvana

Smells Like Teen Spirit

1991

U2

Until the End of the World

1991

Radiohead

Creep

1992

Rage Against The Machine

Killing in the Name

1992

Stereo MC’s

Connected

1992

Cypress Hill

Insane in the Brain

1993

Portishead

Wandering Star

1994

Edwin Collins

A Girl Like You

1995

Everything But The Girl

Missing

1995

Garbage

Only Happy When It Rains

1995

Massive Attack

Karmacoma

1995

Pavement

Range Life

1995

The Prodigy

Breathe

1996

Blur

Song 2

1997

Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

Into My Arms

1997

PJ Harvey

The Wind

1998

Placebo

Pure Morning

1998

Stardust

Music Sounds Better With You

1998

Chemical Brothers

Hey Boy Hey Girl

1999

Eminem

My Name Is

1999

Moby

Natural Blues

1999

Moloko

Sing it Back

1999

Suede

Electricity

1999

The 2000s (12):

Spiller

Groovejet (If This Ain’t Love)

2000

Afroman

Because I Got High

2001

Four Tet

No More Mosquitoes

2001

Kylie Minogue

Can’t Get You Out of My Head

2001

Roger Sanchez

Another Chance

2001

Beck

Lost Cause

2002

X‑Press 2

Lazy

2002

Kasabian

Club Foot

2004

LCD Soundsystem

Daft Punk is Playing at My House

2005

Hot Chip

Ready for the Floor

2008

The Low Anthem

Charlie Darwin

2008

The xx

VCR

2009

The 2010s (3):

Warpaint

Undertow

2010

The Kills

Satellite

2011

Kurt Vile

Baby’s Arms

2011

“The only truth is music” – Jack Kerouac (1922‑1969)

That, my friends, is one heck of a varied mixtape, whether you agree with it or not. No doubt there are many obvious inclusions but also a few surprises. Everyone will have a different upbringing and, therefore, a different soundtrack to their lives. That is just as it should be. I don’t have any music heroes, so there is no artist veneration going on here. This is not purely a nostalgic exercise, it is also about the timelessness of great music that can still evoke emotions regardless of when it was created, who created it or when/where it is experienced. Music is inextricably linked with social change and is an integral part of human progress over the years. This article is but one miniscule attempt to document modern western culture through a selection of musical signposts.

You may well ask, “What, no Elvis Presley, The Beatles, The Who, Bruce Springsteen, Michael Jackson, Madonna, Prince, Fleetwood Mac, Queen or R.E.M.?” or, “What, no Tom Petty, Oasis, Coldplay, Taylor Swift, Adele or Ed Sheeran?” Heresy! I hear you shriek indignantly! Nope. Not for this exercise. I am unrepentant. I will acknowledge that I’m in a minority and that the omissions mentioned are very highly renowned popular and commercial artists. They just didn’t make my final cut. Apologies for your irate infuriation but I’m afraid that’s your issue, not mine.

So, so many fantastic tracks didn’t make the final 100. Great tracks from artists like, Led Zeppelin, Genesis, Marvin Gaye, Beastie Boys, Killers, and many, many more came in and out again, right up to the last minute before publication. It was almost an impossible task to represent a selection that I could live with in total isolation on an unidentified tropical island for an unknown period of time.

“Without music, life would be a mistake” – Friedrich Nietzsche (1844‑1900)

To be totally honest, even 100 tracks wouldn’t satisfy a prolonged period of personal reflection on CRAVE Island. My passion for music isn’t just about repeating the past; it is also about discovering great new music from whatever period and looking to the future. Maybe a lot of that music won’t stand the test of time but it is great for ephemeral escapism. If that’s the case, how many tracks would be enough? Who knows? I don’t.

Even restricting the selection to a ‘top 10’ doesn’t bring the 21st Century into much of a focus. No tracks from the last 15 years in fact. Sorry millennial musicians, you can’t quite make the grade. It doesn’t mean that there isn’t great music being made in the 2000s‑2020s, just that there is such strong competition from the last half of the 20th Century.

“How I wish that somewhere there existed an island for those who are wise and of good will” – Albert Einstein (1879‑1955)


Final Thoughts on the ‘Top 100/10 CRAVE Island Playlist’

As mentioned up front, this particular ‘Top 100’ and its ‘Top 10’ subset is entirely my own creation and constantly changing in the real world, so best regarded as a ‘moment in time’ snapshot. I don’t expect anyone to approve it and I’m not trying to influence anyone based on it. It is just a bit of harmless fun to bring some cathartic levity to a dangerously scary world.

One interesting observation is the proportion of songs that are guitar‑centric. Now that may not be surprising given my predilection for vintage guitars. However, it isn’t quite that simple. Much of the 1980s synth pop boom, the 1990s sampled hip‑hop explosion and the 1990s‑2000s EDM tsunami featured large in my own personal musical evolution but had little contribution from the humble guitar. Another observation is the low proportion of Jamaican reggae on the list, given my overt preference for the genre more generally. The aim here was for variety.

“One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain” – Bob Marley (1945‑1981)

The 2010s and 2020s are woefully unrepresented in this list. Perhaps this is my age or perhaps it is just a reflection on the banal sterility of much modern music in the 21st Century. Probably a bit of both. Time, as ‘they’ say, will tell.

Going back to the spirit of ‘Desert Island Discs’, it only seems fair to contemplate what book and what luxury item one would also take. I guess I have to exclude anything to do with CRAVE Guitars and ‘The Distortion Diaries’, as that would be too easy and too contrived. So, what are the two things that one might pack for that hypothetical trip to CRAVE Island?

The CRAVE Island Book – The CRAVEman doesn’t have written language, so I’ll have to substitute. No pretention here. In a senseless, cruel world, I will return to the pure innocence and naiveté of childhood when adult failures had not yet corrupted one’s life experience. I am neither embarrassed nor ashamed to suggest a children’s book. There were several children’s books about which I can reminisce fondly, including the Moomin novels by Tove Jansson. On this occasion, I’m going with, ‘Gobbolino the Witch’s Cat’ (1942) by Ursula Moray Williams – the original version with illustrations by the author, not modern adaptations that have diluted the impact of the story. It is a simple tale of a witch’s cat that longs to be an ordinary kitchen cat. There is a lot that adults can learn from the moral lessons within this story, if we open our minds to accept them. I am a voracious reader of fiction and there are many examples of pretentious ‘worthy’ literature as well as entertaining popular novels that could be chosen. However, we all had to start that halcyon passage to open the doors of adult imagination somewhere. Simplicity epitomised.

“There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats” – Albert Schweitzer (1875‑1965)

The CRAVE Island Luxury Item – Seeing as The CRAVEman already has his vintage guitar gear with him, he needs something on which to listen to his selected playlist. Music is useless unless there is something on which to store, replay and listen to it. Remember the venerable Apple iPod (2001‑2022)? The iPod was the spiritual successor to the iconic Sony Walkman. Seeing as there must be an electrical supply for vintage guitar gear, I am assuming that it is possible to recharge said portable music listening device. I was tempted to use the same principle to justify a fullyloaded laptop that would provide music replay, as well as all the other things that a laptop can be used for, such as write my own books, record my own music, etc. The fundamental notion here is about going back‑to‑basics so, if I can’t have the multi‑purpose computing device, a humble iPod (with earbuds of course!) would be invaluable. I wish Apple would reissue the iPod for a new generation with a decent amount of storage.

“Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent” – Victor Hugo (1802‑1885)

A quick reflection on the idea of a solitary existence while contemplating being castaway on a deserted island. Some people cannot exist without other people and some cannot function without the external validation by others. Some people manipulate others or are manipulated by them. For some, other people are the means to establish and impose their status and material wealth. Some seek control and power over others. Some seek an audience, some are just desperate for attention and emotional attachment. I cannot abide competition or conflict (I am profoundly non‑confrontational). I abhor political mind games and trivial time wasters. In which case, I (and The CRAVEman) are the antithesis of all these things. I don’t care for social structures, I don’t seek tangible wealth or human companionship. To me, the desert island castaway way of life would be blissful seclusion, away from the wants, needs, demands, responsibilities and obligations of others. Whilst not quite exhibiting the severity of hikikomori, I am very content in the absence of other humans, in fact, I would prefer it. I believe in something bigger than myself, expressed by the infinity of the universe. Who needs people? Besides, I don’t like people very much. Seriously, I would sincerely be satisfied in serene solitude on my own isolated island. Bring it on.

Time for The CRAVEman to pack up his vintage gear as well as his CRAVE Island playlist gear and get back on the CRAVE Airlines plane back to ‘civilisation’ and CRAVE Town.

“No man is an island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main” – John Donne (1571‑1631)


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’

As The CRAVEman is still cast away on a tropical desert island this month, it seems apt to stick with a recording that evokes a sense of music that originated on a real tropical island. It also doesn’t feature in the list above. OK, so this example was actually by a UK band recorded in Belgium but it’s the music that really matters. This month’s accolade goes to…

Misty In Roots – Live At The Counter Eurovision 79 (1979): Misty In Roots is a British roots reggae band formed in 1975 in London, England. The live album was the band’s debut release and comprises seven tracks covering 37 minutes. It was recorded during the ’Counter Eurovision’ event, which was intended as a creative alternative to the popular mainstream Eurovision Song Contest (NB. hosted and won by Israel). The Counter Eurovision event took place in Brussels, Belgium on 31 March and 1 April, 1979. The album is widely regarded as one of the best live reggae albums of all time (up there with Bob Marley & The Wailers, ‘Live!’ (1975)). In 2025, a special edition was released to commemorate the album’s 50th anniversary, followed by the band’s 50th anniversary tour in 2026.

I have to admit that this particular album was played frequently after it was released and it remains a firm favourite today. I don’t believe that Misty In Roots has made a better album since, sadly. The production of subsequent studio albums couldn’t capture the raw passion of the band giving 100% on stage. It may not be strictly authentic Jamaican roots but it’s a darned fine reggae album nevertheless. Well worth tracking down.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“The wise man makes an island of himself that no flood can overwhelm” – Buddha (Siddhārtha Gautama – c.480‑400BCE)


Tailpiece

Another month, another article. I hope you found something in there to entertain you, just a little bit. We all need something to motivate us, to make us get up every morning, to keep going day after day in this brutal, fractured perverse world. If music has the power to heal, to evoke emotions and help to maintain our mental health, wellbeing and resilience, then it is something we all need right now, more than ever.

Once again, I have absolutely no idea what’s coming up next month. I guess we’ll all have to check in to find out, me included.

“Every island to a child is a treasure island” – P.D. James (1920‑2014)

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. The CRAVEman, signing off for now. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “Hope is based on progress, resulting in a future that will be better than both the past and the present. Faith is that we will do it well”

© 2026 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


 

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March 2026 – CRAVE Island Castaway Part I: Vintage Gear

Prelude

A WONDERFULLY WARM WELCOME to springtime great world citizens. Spring is my favourite season of the year. It signifies newness, rejuvenation, growth, freshness and the promise of warmer days and lighter evenings for a few months (at least here in the cool temperate region of the northern hemisphere). Nature is a wonderful thing and something not only to be valued but also marvelled at for its diversity and perpetuity. Without it, we’d be doomed. Talking of which…

Just when you thought the outright insanity of conflicted malevolent states couldn’t get any worse, wholesale recklessness won out and we have even worse devastation, many more dead innocents, instability and incalculable money irrevocably wasted on killing and destruction. I would argue that such precious resources should be used to advance humanity and solve the world’s inequalities. I am beginning to doubt that common sense will prevail any time soon, if ever. Yes, I am angry and, unfortunately, I am powerless to do anything about it. Civilisation needs civilised leaders. Humanity needs humane leaders. Society needs sane leaders. Communities need caring leaders. What we have in 2026 are not leaders, they are monsters; very, very real and very, very dangerous monsters. Take heed before it is too late for us all.

“Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime” – Ernest Hemmingway (1899‑1961)


This Month at CRAVE Guitars…

This time around, I had to do some simple soul‑searching and reach some sort of selection about what vintage gear I would choose if I only had a limited number of options.

For the record, I don’t like having to divide vintage gear into favourites and not favourites. It’s a bit like having to choose your favourite child. Each CRAVE instrument has been selected for its individual characteristics and each has its merits. Each one also has its detriments. I do not believe that there is a ‘perfect’ guitar. However, I set this challenge simply as a hypothetical exercise and the outcome may well be different tomorrow, next month, next year, etc.

From CRAVE Guitars’ modest vintage guitar gear ‘collection’, there are a few choice picks – guitars, a bass and effects that I keep going back to, enjoy playing, love the sound of, gaze at longingly just because they are beautiful objects and, importantly, ones that I have developed a particular and deep connection with over the years.

This article is a bit of a reprise. Kind of. Way, way back in September 2015, not long after CRAVE Guitars became a virtual as well as a real entity, I published an article, ‘My Top 10 Vintage Guitars (So Far)’. It is that bracketed pair of words that gives an entry point into reviewing that selection and updating it now, over a decade later. Back in 2015, I narrowed guitars down to makes and headline models, not specific variants, for instance Gibson Les Paul or Fender Stratocaster. Here is the link to the original 2015 Article (link opens in new browser tab)…

Article – September 2015 – My Top 10 Vintage Guitars (So Far)

This time, I’m going to be a bit more specific and a bit harsher. Now, the Top 10 covers not just guitars but also vintage guitars, basses, effects and amps. This article represents a narrower selection from a broader assortment. I couldn’t tell you how many items I had back in 2015 (or even now), but the overall totals have probably doubled – give or take – over the last 11 years.

“Make an island of yourself, make yourself your refuge; there is no other refuge. Make truth your island, make truth your refuge; there is no other refuge – Buddha (Siddhārtha Gautama – c.480‑400BCE)


The Rationale for the Article

I have chosen the ‘marooned on a tropical desert island’ approach here because it provides for a more positive decision‑making process, rather than the desperately negative ‘in a burning building, which one(s) would you save’. The latter, by definition, means that I would have to sacrifice the rest to irrevocable destruction (please forgive the split infinitive on this occasion), which I just couldn’t contemplate.

A tropical desert island may not be an ideal environment for conserving vintage gear, and securing a reliable and consistent electrical supply might prove challenging. This is therefore purely a case of conjecture and an exercise in entertainment. Welcome to CRAVE Island.

I’m sticking to a cap of 10 pieces of kit, simply as an arbitrary number. Choosing less would be overly restrictive, choosing more would basically be a broad reflection of the CRAVE Guitars family. A figure had to be set, so 10 it is.

Assuming that there are no perfect guitars means that all of the ones listed have their idiosyncrasies. So it is personal predilection that promotes the ‘chosen few’ to a considered conclusion. A selective approach may raise the question of whether the rest of CRAVE Guitars could be divested? Nope. I may consider trading up in a few cases because I want to, not because I have to.

Although I didn’t need to, I have used The CRAVEman as a vehicle to emphasise the nonsense of the concept in the first place. Rather than carry out this task at his home community of CRAVE Town in CRAVEland (see the November 2025 article, ‘The CRAVEman Cometh… Back’), The CRAVEman is embarking on a two‑month solo offshore excursion to the remote tropical desert destination of CRAVE Island. Ridiculous? Of course! Delusional? Obviously! C’mon, what did you expect?

As usual AI was used to generate The CRAVEman’s images this month. No AI was used for the narrative and the vintage guitar images are 100% genuine. This month’s ‘quotes of wisdom’ are about desert island life.

“You can’t totally rebel, otherwise you have to go live on your own, on a desert island. It’s as simple as that” – Patrick McGoohan (1928‑2009)


The CRAVEman’s Top Ten Desert Island Vintage Gear

So, with just 10 pieces of gear to pack and transport to the metaphorical paradise of CRAVE Island, it was as difficult job deciding what to take and what to leave behind. However, having determined the criteria, one has to comply with the rules. Without further ado, here are ‘the chosen few’ (in alphabetic order – links open in new browser tab)…

1965 Fender Jaguar – There is something gloriously captivating about Fender’s offsets whether the Jaguar or its sibling the Jazzmaster, and even the Electric XII or Bass VI. Leo got it spot on with this design. It was a very close run between the Jaguar and Jazzmaster. The Jaguar edged ahead because of its more striking aesthetic and, because I have short stubby fingers, the shorter scale just suits my hands better. The Brazilian rosewood fingerboard is sublime. Oh, it feels so good to play and it sounds exquisite, edging out the Jazzmaster for me… just. While I’d love a custom colour, the standard 3‑colour sunburst still looks gorgeous. It is a bit on the heavy side and the vibrato/bridge takes a bit of getting used to but such foibles are easily tolerated.

Feature – 1965 Fender Jaguar


1972 Fender Telecaster Thinline – The original mass produced solid body electric guitar launched in 1951, the Telecaster, is an undoubted and enduring classic. This year is its 75th anniversary and the archetype remains largely unchanged to this day. The 1970s saw several variants like the Telecaster Deluxe, Custom and the utterly stunning Thinline, my personal favourite. It just looks so ‘right’ with its single f‑hole (it is only part hollowed out), the natural finish, a groovy pearloid pickguard and those amazing wide range Seth Lover‑designed humbucking pickups. The latter really make the Telecaster Thinline sound grown up and fundamentally different from its workhorse progenitor. I prefer rosewood fingerboards but on this guitar, maple works very nicely thank you and it feels just as right as it looks and sounds. It’s light, functional and organic as well as beautiful.

Feature – 1972 Fender Telecaster Thinline


1963 Gibson ES‑330 – Gibson has released several ES (Electric Spanish) guitars over the decades (going back to the original ES‑150 in 1936). However, it was the thinline ES‑335 that really broke the semi‑acoustic into the contemporary mainstream, where it is considered a flexible workhorse suited to most styles. However, for my money, it is the 335’s close relative, the fully hollow ES‑330 that won me over. It is lighter and more resonant than the heavier centre‑block 335 and its pair of wonderful P90 pickups set it apart with its own distinctive voice. OK, so the neck joins the body at the 16th rather than the 335’s 19th fret but who cares when the rest of the package is so wonderful. It is a breeze to play. Even the factory Bigsby vibrato suits the image and it stays in tune. It may feedback in high gain, high sound pressure level environments but those don’t really exist anymore. As a result, the ES‑330 is rightly being re‑evaluated. Oh and it looks the part – one of the prettiest guitar designs out there.

Feature – 1963 Gibson ES‑330


1982 Gibson Explorer CMT – I have said on many occasions that the Gibson Explorer is probably my favourite solid body guitar. They are far better than the one‑trick pony image that one might think them to be. Original Explorers from the 1950s and early 1960s are mouth wateringly expensive, so it is the subsequent reissues that make the grade here. CRAVE Guitars has five (!) Explorers and they are all great in their own ways. My choice, though, is the first one I acquired, the stunningly beautiful CMT (not E2, as on the truss rod cover) with its single piece flame maple sunburst top and ebony fingerboard. It is seriously heavy, which is possibly its only notable drawback. It is probably not a go‑to guitar for a function band but for that’s an irrelevancy. Just as well I don’t play in one then. The renowned Gibson ‘Dirty Fingers’ humbucking pickups balance power and finesse spectacularly well. If this were a car, it would be a V8 Ford Mustang.

Feature – 1982 Gibson Explorer CMT


1968 Gibson SG Standard – Back in 2015, I selected CRAVE Guitars’ Gibson SG Junior with its wonderfully gritty single P90 pickup and baseball bat neck. Now, in 2026, the Junior was up against the SG Standard, another guitar that looks so ‘right’ and feels even better. The Standard doesn’t deliver the raw, visceral inspiration of the Junior but what it does bring to the table is more refinement and versatility. The ‘devil horns’ are still evocative and modern looking over 60 years after it was introduced as a Les Paul Model replacement in 1961. Upper fret access is possibly the best of any mainstream Gibson, making the mahogany neck potentially vulnerable. The SG Standard is light, resonant and, while a touch neck heavy, it is a joy to play, sounds fabulous and looks the part with its great cherry finish. For all of that, the Standard edged out the Junior. Just.

Feature – 1968 Gibson SG Standard


1962 National Glenwood 95 – Sometimes a guitar comes along that breaks the rules in more than one way. In the early 1960s, National released a fibreglass (Res‑o‑Glas) hollow body with single coil pickups and a stunning futuristic/retro design, loosely based on the outline of the lower 48 US states. Just look at those ‘butterfly’ fingerboard inlays too. Purists will condemn it for its lack of a tone wood body and ‘classic’ pickups, but they are missing the point. National dared to be different and, in my view, succeeded. It was brazen and radical and all the better for it. Not only does it look superb, it also plays very nicely despite not having an adjustable truss rod. No tone wood. No problem. Not here anyway. Perhaps the pickups can sound a bit lean compared to the best (not great for heavy metal!) but who’s arguing? Stunning.

Feature – 1962 National Glenwood 95


1978 Music Man Stingray Bass – Onto CRAVE Basses. 2026 is the 50th anniversary of the Music Man Stingray bass. Yep, almost unbelievable. Music Man is what Leo Fender did after he sold the company that bears his name and had fulfilled his contractual obligation not to do anything else for 10 years after selling Fender to CBS. The Stingray may bear some resemblance to the Fender Precision but it is a very different beast with its single humbucking bridge pickup and active on‑board electronics. After a brief period, Leo moved on to G&L and Music Man was bought out by Ernie Ball. The Stingray, however is still going strong today with a solid and enviable reputation amongst professional bass players and enthusiasts alike. It is a great funky bass that still stands out from the crowd and sits head and shoulders above many of its peers. I bought this one from the UK importer before it ever reached retail, so I am still the original owner. Very cool.

Feature – 1978 Music Man Stingray Bass


1977 Electro-Harmonix Big Muff Pi – Moving onto CRAVE Effects, my all‑time favourite effect pedal is probably the EHX Big Muff Pi. I have owned this one from new and its all‑out manic signature fuzz is just insane with massive amounts of awesome personality. There was, and still is, nothing quite like a (vintage) Big Muff. It sounds just superb and suits my weird musical tastes to a tee. Subtle it is not. It sounds even better when it interacts with other effects like a cool (Electro‑Harmonix) flanger and echo (a.k.a. analogue delay – see below). Think of Ernie Isley’s guitar solo from, ‘Summer Breeze’ (1974) by The Isley Brothers and you begin to get the idea. Marvellously mad and crazily kooky from Electro‑Harmonix’s pioneering founder Mike Matthews, based in New York City since 1968.

Feature – 1977 Electro-Harmonix Big Muff Pi


1977 Electro-Harmonix Deluxe Memory Man – Like the EHX Big Muff Pi above, I have owned this superb all‑analogue ‘bucket‑brigade device’ Deluxe Memory Man delay pedal since new. It pairs with the fuzz in an almost symbiotic fashion. This list is limited, otherwise I would also have included the Electro‑Harmonix Electric Mistress flanger. If you want far out psych, organically natural echo or dubby atmospherics, the Memory Man is there for you. It is easily pushed into OTT regeneration. OK, so the delay is limited to around 300‑400ms – short by today’s digital standards. It sounds organic and doesn’t provide pristine digital delay but when it sounds this good, it’s not really an issue. For me, the Deluxe Memory Man is an indispensable creative tool in a hypothetical desert island situation.

Feature – 1977 Electro-Harmonix Deluxe Memory Man


1973 Fender Princeton Reverb – While the diminutive single channel hand‑wired valve amp with its 10” speaker is almost perfect for guitar, it isn’t really robust enough to take on the Music Man Bass. However, as this is a make‑believe scenario, that’s kinda irrelevant. The Fender Princeton has a long history dating back to 1946 and it came with or without reverb. For me, the reverb is a ‘good to have’ facility along with the (rather weak) tremolo (erroneously called vibrato). I don’t care that it has the 1970s’ ‘silverface’ control panel, I really don’t. For me, it is the ideal small amp and only just beats the Music Man 210 Sixty‑Five. It is small, (relatively) light and sounds absolutely fantastic. Pushing a small Fender valve amp into overdrive can sound just as satisfying as a Marshall stack in the right setting and far more portable. It may not be the loudest amp out there but it is an organically dynamic masterpiece.

Feature – 1973 Fender Princeton Reverb


So there you go, a worthy ‘Top 10’ of vintage gear comprising 6 guitars, 1 bass, 2 effects and 1 amp. While I would have preferred to take all of CRAVE Guitars’ vintage gear to CRAVE Island, the selection arguably represents the pinnacle of the ‘collection’, at least at the time of writing. I expect that the selection would be different at a different time and will no doubt be different(‑ish) at some point in the future when this exercise is (possibly) repeated in another decade or so. In the meantime, I’d better start looking for a power socket.

Interestingly, things haven’t changed that much from 2015. Back then, I selected the following 10 guitars:

  1. Gibson SG
  2. Gibson Explorer
  3. Fender Telecaster
  4. Gibson Les Paul
  5. Fender Jazzmaster
  6. Fender Mustang
  7. Gibson Firebird
  8. Fender Stratocaster
  9. Gibson Melody Maker
  10. Gibson ES‑330

A little bit of consistency was probably to be expected and quite notable. This time, it was even harder as there was a smaller number of guitars selected from a much larger number of possible options. Back in 2015, the article was all about guitars and didn’t cover basses, effects or amps. Eleven years ago, there simply wasn’t CRAVE Basses, CRAVE Effects or CRAVE Amps, so things have definitely moved on a bit and for the better.

The ‘top ten’ aren’t the rarest or most valuable CRAVE Guitars. That wasn’t the objective or one of the criteria used. Cool and rare to a point – monetary value simply isn’t important to me, except when buying of course. Many critics might condemn the selection because there isn’t a Fender Stratocaster, Gibson Les Paul or Fender Bass. I’m OK with that – after all, it is my selection. No blasphemy here folks. Make up your own scenarios to satisfy your own predispositions.

“Living in a society, instead of on a desert island, does not relieve a man of the responsibility of supporting his own life” – Ayn Rand (1905‑1982)


Final Thoughts about The CRAVEman’s Top Ten Desert Island Vintage Gear

This article has focused on guitars, basses, effects and amps drawn from CRAVE Guitars’ ‘collection’. This might not reflect what my ‘top ten’ might be if the pool from which the selection was made was much, much larger. What if I could choose any ten items regardless of whether I owned them or not? What would that ‘top ten’ be? How would it differ?

Well, that is speculative and therefore irrelevant to this exercise, so I’m not going there at this point. How could I possibly say what would be my ideal when I don’t have access to the items or have the opportunity to build a working relationship with them? One might have some ideal aspiration, only to find out that there would be no synergy with it. Relying on some sort of unjustified anticipation of what something may be like is no guarantee of anything at all. An ideal might turn out to be a great disappointment, while something seemingly innocuous may turn out to be a complete revelation. That, my good people, is part of the fascination with vintage guitar gear and why I love it as much as I do.

“The heart of a man is very much like the sea, it has its storms, it has its tides, and in its depths, it has its pearls too” – Vincent Van Gogh (1853‑1890)

There are plenty of instruments on CRAVE Guitars’ ‘most wanted’ list but just how essential are those desirables to achieving some sort of nirvana or personal actualisation? I would posture that it is impossible to say definitively. I am very content with what I have and very grateful to be in the fortunate position to possess what I already own. I am humble in the midst of abundance. Any further additions to CRAVE Guitars/Basses/Effects/Amps, I would now regard as ‘icing on the cake’.

Thus, I don’t think I want to enter into any sort of speculation as to what any sort of theoretical ‘top ten’ might be or whether it would be hugely different anyway. I might return to explore the whys and wherefores of some ‘most wanted’ vintage gear at some point in the future.

Just a thought… How did The CRAVEman end up on a desert island in the first place, you may well ask? Why? And how did he get home again? Well, if you’ve seen The CRAVEman in action before, you’ll know that the concept of the Stone Age Rock God requires a significant suspension of disbelief on the part of the onlooker. The foundational basis of The CRAVEman is plainly ridiculous in the first instance, so how could anyone be surprised in the slightest about what el jefe does?

As previously mentioned, the hyper‑fictional escapades of The CRAVEman are presented purely for your amusement, even if the core basis of the article is more serious, factual and impartial. The CRAVEman images may be AI generated and all the errors and inconsistencies within them are part and parcel of his fanciful virtual existence. Just go with the flow and it’s more fun. Please. Everything else is real.

“What a splendid king you’d make of a desert island – you and you alone” – Sophocles (c.497/496‑406/405BCE)


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’

In Part II of this series, I will be exploring what music The CRAVEman might listen to on his tropical desert island. What I don’t want to do is to pre‑empt that exercise now, so here I shall select an album that exudes the almost‑spiritual and evocative vibes that would be fitting for the confinement and solitude of CRAVE Island. Given that premise, it was quite easy to select some appropriate Jamaican reggae. Desert island music, I believe, needs something upbeat, positive, uplifting and profoundly conscious in its underlying messages. It is a very familiar album for once – I don’t usually go for popular, commercially successful mainstream albums – and still a great one. This month’s accolade goes to…

Bob Marley & The Wailers – Exodus (1977): ‘Exodus’ was the ninth studio album from Robert Nesta Marley (1945‑1981) and his band, released in June 1977 on Island Records. It may not be a perfect studio album but one with so many highpoints that the overall impact is entirely positive. The original album is slight, at just 10 tracks covering 37 minutes. The opening track, ‘Natural Mystic’ provides a sublime entry point, leading into many other gems of faith, political and emotional treasure. The title track closes the first ‘half’ of the album. Marley’s close associates, Peter Tosh and Bunny Wailer had left the band in 1974, leaving Bob Marley as the main focus. Strangely, ‘Exodus’ was not recorded in Kingston, Jamaica but in London, UK, following a failed assassination attempt in 1976 when Marley was shot in a home invasion that forced him to leave his homeland temporarily. It was this album that effectively launched Bob Marley to international stardom, creating a genuine legend in the process.

An atmospheric album that is just right for a balmy desert island beach at dusk after the sun has set and just as the stars begin to blink into visibility, the sky prismatic and incandescent above the horizon of a tranquil moonlight‑reflected sea. Some reggae can be transcendent and that is the case with this month’s masterpiece from a genuine Jamaican icon. The author was lucky enough to visit Jamaica in 2008 and can testify to the idyll, as well as to the day‑to‑day challenges that the Jamaican population face. Irie mon.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“The sea, once it casts its spell, holds one in its net of wonder forever” – Jacques Cousteau (1910‑1997)


Tailpiece

I hope you’ve enjoyed a reflective trip into a fabricated tropical paradise where The CRAVEman passes his time with some of his precious vintage gear for company. Personally, it is a situation that I wouldn’t mind experiencing myself. Seclusion as a lifestyle choice is something to be treasured and protected. I would relish it. The reality of survival on a deserted island in the tropics, as one might expect, is not the heaven‑on‑Earth utopia one might wish for. Thus, it is purely a notional creation for your enjoyment.

“Nature once determined how we survive. Now we determine how nature survives” – David Attenborough (1926‑)

As the title of this article suggests, this is part one of two complementary pieces. While this one looked at vintage guitar gear, used to create music, the next one will take a selection of existing music and use it to compile a desert island playlist for The CRAVEman to enjoy when he isn’t playing his own compositions. We will return to CRAVE Island and I hope you’ll return for part two.

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. The CRAVEman, signing off for now. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “And so the wind blows and the rain pours down on the wicked and good alike”

© 2026 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


 

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January 2026 – CRAVE Guitars Articles: The First 100 and More

posted in: History, Introduction, News, Opinion | 0

Prelude

GRACIOUS GREETINGS GENIAL GENTLEFOLK. Here we are again. A warm and wonderful welcome to the shiny new Gregorian year of two thousand and twenty six, albeit almost a month old at the time of writing. I hope the lavish lustre hasn’t been tarnished too soon. The ebullient optimism ignited by the prospect of New Year doesn’t last anywhere near long enough, resulting in the inevitable anti‑climax of the dreaded January blues. One might believe that a new year and a new quarter century should hold a whole host of opportunity and potential. The trick is to find where that opportunity and potential can be tapped into, in order to achieve whatever goals one might set oneself. Simple?! No. Not really. Shame. Don’t you think?

So, what objectives does CRAVE Guitars have in store for the start of 2026. To be honest, given punitive previous experience, it makes sense to be selective within an external environment of prevailing global uncertainty and volatility. There are several personal ‘projects’ from which I have selected four priorities. The first and probably most obvious is to acquire some more cool and rare vintage gear to share with everyone. The second is to publish ‘The Distortion Diaries’ at long last. The third is to develop further the stalwart stories of ‘el jefe’, The CRAVEman. The fourth and least likely to succeed is to make some progress on the much‑needed, much‑delayed CRAVEcave – to convert the house’s cold, dark, damp cellar into a warm, lit and dry CRAVE Guitars emporium of sorts (showcase, not retail). So, that is four declared objectives. I think that three of the priorities are achievable and one is a tad over‑ambitious, so I don’t think they are unreasonable as aspirations for the next eleven months.


This Month at CRAVE Guitars…

The subject matter for the first gleaming, glittery article of 2026 is to celebrate an achievement that will have gone totally unnoticed. The topic this month comprises a cursory retrospective of CRAVE Guitars’ articles (a.k.a. Musings) so far and what that might mean for the future. The rationale underpinning this exemplary epic episode is hitting the milestone of 100 articles published on the web site. Even though CRAVE Guitars has been around in some form or other since 2007, blog articles published on the website only began seven years later in 2014. Even then it wasn’t all smooth sailing, as we shall see.

This month’s ‘quotes of wisdom’ are, perhaps unsurprisingly, about the achievement of life’s milestones. For alliteration aficionados, all perfectly present and passionately precise! Very few images this month I’m afraid, as this is another one for avid list‑o‑philes. As usual, no AI was used in researching or writing this article just Real Stoopid (RS) hooman ‘blood, sweat and tears’ (NB. although widely attributed to Winston Churchill’s speech in 1940, the idiom derives from, “’tis in vaine to dew, or mollifie it with thy teares, or sweat, or blood,” appearing in the poem, ‘First Anniversary: An Anatomy Of The World’ (1611) by John Donne (1571‑1631)).


The First 100 Articles

I am sure that it wasn’t at all obvious to readers that CRAVE Guitars’ December 2025 Musing was the 100th article published on the web site but it was.

It all started so very innocent and naïve, way back in November 2014, eleven years and two months ago at the time of typing. The embryonic web site had just gone live and the first blog was just two introductory paragraphs and a paltry 186 words. December 2014 wasn’t much stronger, still two paragraphs and just 263 words. At that time, I had no idea where this was going, if anywhere. The catalyst for writing blogs was simply a result of the IT platform used – WordPress – which began as a blogging tool before it also became a web site design tool. WordPress required a ‘blog’ post page at the time. One thing that was clear right from the start was that I couldn’t blog continuously, like many others do. In 2014, I was in full time paid employment, as well as an unpaid carer; I simply could not commit to the pressures of a blogger’s traditional online presence.

“Life isn’t a matter of milestones, but of moments” – Rose Kennedy (1890‑1995)

Over the years, the length and complexity of articles grew significantly. There were multi‑part articles, like ‘A Potted History of the Guitar’ (9 parts – March 2018 to November 2018) and the even more ambitious ‘The Story of Modern Music in 1,500+ Facts’ (14 parts – March 2019 to May 2020) – the longest series so far. Both of these series have unfortunately since suffered from the imposed retroactive removal of illustrative images (see ‘Things I Have Learned’ below for more on that).

Some while later, came CRAVE Guitars’ shortest blog in September 2020, the ‘Hiatus’, a heart‑breaking statement at just one paragraph and 62 words. I only intended for there to be a short break but it lasted three years (!) until August 2023 when abnormal service was resumed with, perhaps my favourite article so far, ‘Dub Reggae Revelation’.

As a result of the hiatus, it has taken much longer to reach the 100 mark than originally intended. Since the hiatus, I have kept up the discipline of publishing monthly articles covering a diverse range of subject matter. I have tried very hard to vary the material over the years to keep things fresh and interesting.

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence” – Helen Keller (1880‑1968)

I haven’t regretted anything I’ve written so far, whether agreeable or not. That is, I think, called integrity. I am certain that I could have done things better but that benefit results from hindsight, evolution and learning (see below). I have enjoyed some articles more than others. I’ve already mentioned, ‘Dub Reggae Revelation’ as the zenith and the extremely short, ‘Hiatus’ (also aforementioned) as the nadir.

Up to now, there has been no comprehensive list of CRAVE Guitars’ articles in one place. The only other way to catalogue them is to wade through nine pages of Musings. In order to correct that particular shortcoming, here – without further ado – is ‘The First 100 Articles List’ (each link opens in a new tab)…


2014 (articles 1-2)


2015 (articles 3-14)


2016 (articles 15-26)


2017 (articles 27-38)


2018 (articles 39-50)


2019 (articles 51-62)


2020 (articles 63-71)

The Hiatus – There were no articles published between October 2020 and July 2023 inclusive.


2023 (articles 72-76)


2024 (articles 77-88)


2025 (articles 89-100)


This ‘directory’ will probably re‑appear in due course under the CRAVE Guitars’ web site’s ‘Resources’ pages as an easy reference.

“Remember to celebrate milestones as you prepare for the road ahead” – Nelson Mandela (1918‑2023)


Things I Have Learned

After 11 years and 100 articles (and goodness knows how many tens of thousands of words), you’d think I should have learned something, right? I also would hope that my skills as an author should have improved somewhat over last decade or so. Whether my abilities have indeed improved or not, I have no idea. Sometimes, though, it can be productive to take a step back, review, assess, reflect, learn and develop. The general rule is that incremental improvement is better than radical change.

The length and complexity of articles varies considerably. I have learned that more doesn’t always mean more and that brevity is something that I should seek to improve. However, I just can’t help my naïve, inexpert verbosity and tendency for pretentious flowery prose. Sorry.

“It’s when ordinary people rise above the expectations and seize the opportunity that milestones truly are reached” – Mike Huckabee (1955‑)

The content does need to have its prime focus on vintage guitars, although I have learned that focusing more and more forensically can be a rabbit hole down which it is difficult to retain objectivity and interest. There is only so much geekiness in nerd city that one can write about vintage gear before it becomes, well, dull and boring. American philosopher Nicholas Butler (1862‑1947) once said, “An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing”. I have regarded that as sage advice, so I try to nurture a broad intellect as a result. The mix of subject matter, I hope, counteracts the risk of dry factual content and inevitable repetitiveness. Did I mention repetitiveness? LoL. Variety also makes things a bit more interesting for me as well.

CRAVE Guitars’ approach has been, and still is, to publish one in‑depth article per month. Many bloggers publish much shorter excerpts far more frequently. My methodology is a personal preference and, therefore, a conscious choice. It is the way I work… and it is serious work as far as I am concerned, albeit unpaid. It is not a trivial hobby and it is not an idle pastime. I would, however, struggle to do anything more prolific.

For high frequency posts, CRAVE Guitars is active on social media, with at least one relevant post every day (except during the 3‑year hiatus). CRAVE Guitars’ social media presence kicked off in December 2014, shortly after the web site went live.

“Nothing behind me, everything ahead of me, as it is ever so on the road” – Jack Kerouac (1922‑1969)

The multi‑part series approach is one way to present a large volume of material in a digestible format. However, it also takes up a huge amount of time and energy to research, corroborate and write. Internet resources are – surprise, surprise – notoriously unreliable and inaccurate. Sometimes it is easier (but not necessarily better) to write a lot and to split it into a series. The problem with brevity for its own sake is that some potentially interesting material has to be omitted. Balance is therefore important. Duh! Splitting material over several articles is a matter of pragmatism as well as a concern for readers’ patience… and my own sanity.

I much prefer to use images in my articles. It breaks up the narrative and looks far more inviting to prospective readers. However, one component of the perfect storm that resulted in the hiatus was the aftermath of using images from Google Images to illustrate articles, only to fall foul of using copyrighted material. As a result, all non‑CRAVE produced images were removed from the web site and, retrospectively, from all CRAVE articles. This is not ideal but it is a harsh reality of 21st Century litigatory culture and a key learning point. As ‘they’ say, ‘once bitten, twice shy’. (NB. A phrase that first appeared in the novel, ‘The History of Miss Betsy Thoughtless’ (1751) by Eliza Haywood (1693‑1756))

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. It’s about creating yourself” – George Bernard Shaw

Regular readers will know that I also like to use credible quotes from wise people to help illustrate the narrative. I think this works well and adds some colour to an otherwise monochrome palate. Contrary to what you might think, it isn’t just an immature tacky expedient.

Regular readers will also know that each article ends with a CRAVE ‘Quote of the Month’. These are my own original pontifications on life, the universe and everything (thank you Douglas Adams). The first CRAVE quote appeared in November 2015 and one quote has been present in every article since (making 89 in total including this month – another 11 to go before that particular list also gets to 100). I hope that the quality of these amateur observations has also improved over the years. I particularly like this month’s quote btw. Some snippets may be controversial but, then again, aren’t the most insightful observations about the human condition often provocative and potentially divisive? I will continue to poke ‘the hornet’s nest’ (NB. A term first documented in ‘A Compleat History of Europe’ (1705) by David Jones) when I believe that a positive prod is needed.

“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit” – Harry S. Truman (1884‑1972)

Arguably, one of my most irritating tendencies is probably my peculiar penchant for pathetically puerile alliteration. It is one of my go‑to literary techniques and I will continue to be childish and silly. Sorry again.

Possibly also irritating are my frequent nota bene (NB. Latin, literally meaning ‘note well’) references, often relating to obscure European literature. I find words and their etymological derivations fascinating, so I try to litter articles with random interesting non sequiturs (NB. from the Latin, ‘it doesn’t follow’). Sic! (NB. from the Latin adverb, ‘so’ and meaning in English ‘intentionally so written’, dating from c.1856). There ya go.

“Learning never exhausts the mind” – Leonardo da Vinci (1452‑1519)

Another irritating tendency for readers is probably my very robust opinions about the need to improve civilisation, society and our environment, which I strongly believe is essential for the longevity and prosperity of mankind and our dependency on the planet’s finite and fragile natural ecosystems. When will humanity come to its senses and establish a civilisation with a strong future that is peaceful, just and sustainable? I cannot come to terms with the utter insanity of destructive global geopolitics at the start of 2026 and, sadly, I can’t see it getting better any time soon. If there is one thing in this irrational world that I could possibly influence, that would be it.

Back to writing; some general structural, presentational and consistency needs improving, such as title capitalisation, blog format and grammatical style. These have evolved over time and are much better than they used to be. Probably best described as work‑in‑progress. My late wife (her passing was another contributor to the hiatus) used to proof read articles before publication. Sadly, that last‑minute check & balance is no longer available to me, so errors may well be present.

“Your time is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s life” – Steve Jobs (1955‑2011)

I hope that one thing comes through loud and proud is my unwavering passion for music – playing it (badly!), listening to it, amassing music CDs and attending live music events. The vintage guitar gear collection manifested directly from these cravings (sic!). While my main hankering for music collecting is roots and dub reggae, my contemporary musical listening tastes are very diverse.

One thing is for sure, I have learned a great deal from all the in‑depth investigation that goes into compiling content for the articles. That includes the process as well as the outcome. So, even if no‑one else reads anything, I now have a much better understanding of many things that are of interest to me and hopefully to readers. It has also made me think quite profoundly and fundamentally about a wide range of things. The result is that I have become a bit of a ‘jack of all trades’ (NB. an expression dating from the 16th Century, regarded as a negative abbreviation of the more balanced ‘jack of all trades, master of none but oftentimes better than master of one’, suggesting a more versatile and adaptable skillset – the origin dates back at least to 1592 and Robert Greene referring to William Shakespeare as a ‘Johannes factotum’). I regard ‘generalist’ and ‘expert’ as opposing ends of a continuum and, arguably, the ideal position being at some point along the continuum depending on context – they are not mutually exclusive.

“The best way to predict the future is to create it” – Peter Drucker (1909‑2005)

AI will undoubtedly impact on all forms of creative industry in the future, including writing, music and art, either directly or indirectly, whether we like it or not. I covered the implications of the evolving technology in the 3‑part series, ‘Artificial Intelligence Takes on Vintage Guitars’ (March to May 2024). That is the only occasion where I have used AI narrative to prove a point – AI doesn’t give a flying fig what the subject matter is – it is a process tool but nothing more at the moment. AI, for instance, has no idea and doesn’t care what a vintage guitar is, what it is used for, why it is valued or its relevance to anything else. AI algorithms can manipulate data but it has no real insight – it does not have original ideas about anything at all – it can harvest data and output information but it cannot provide knowledge. All other CRAVE articles are the hard work of my inadequate, fallible, spongy hooman brainium.

I have, however, used AI for images, particularly for The CRAVEman articles, as this is the only way that I can bring him to artificial ‘life’ and produce artwork about him, even with all its inconsistencies and errors. Also, copyright currently resides with the end‑user (‘the creator’) inputting prompts that are then interpreted by AI algorithms (‘processing’) to produce static images, video, text, audio, etc. (‘output’). So, for the time being at least, I am on safe ground copyright‑wise. Once again, I have learned that judicious balance is the key here.

While on the subject of The CRAVEman; he has become the outward looking face of CRAVE Guitars while the author’s identity remains private and intentionally enigmatic. Who I am matters not. No‑one wants or needs or cares to know who I am.

Wow! That is quite a lot of learning. I hope, though, it gives a bit of an understanding into the process of bringing content to the customer. So, will these learning points change CRAVE Guitars’ articles going forward? Probably not a great deal because of the inescapable, finite, common constant and constraint – the human element, i.e. me. That, I am afraid, you are stuck with, like it or not. Apologies again.

“Sometimes milestones are not measured by the accomplishments of society, but by those of integrity” – Tamara Ecclestone (1984‑)


The Next 100 Articles

When it comes to future articles, I usually try to work on ideas about three months in advance, if possible. I also try to get around to drafting at least one article ahead of schedule while still editing the imminent article to be published. This takes a lot of the deadline pressure off writing. Sometimes, I run into a blank and have to come up with something I wasn’t expecting, often at short notice, which can actually prove to be quite satisfying. Sometimes, the material prescribes an agenda, for instance, the aforementioned 14‑part ‘Story of Modern Music’, which effectively dictated subject matter for more than a whole year.

One of the problems of not buying much in the way of ‘new’ vintage guitar gear recently is that I don’t have a great deal of topical vintage gear acquisitions to write about at the moment, which is a shame. Writing a web site feature is one thing. However, it tends to take things out of context and sometimes it is nice to write about vintage gear within a broader canvas.

“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today” – Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882‑1945)

I have stated on many occasions that the work involved in writing comprehensive articles means that I do not have sufficient time to write/edit, ‘The Distortion Diaries’. I still haven’t been able to balance the workload to enable both in a way that I feel comfortable about. The pressure of deadlines mean that monthly articles tend to get priority over the novel, which is very, very, very frustrating. I must try to simplify and streamline article writing, so I can finally publish the fictional novel. Unfortunately, temporal manipulation (time travel) isn’t within my skill set to affect.

Some regular thematic content will prevail, such as alliteration, quotes, campaigning for a better world, musicology, etc. Some subject matter will prevail, such as The CRAVEman adventures and annual end‑of‑year reviews. When there is some vintage guitar gear to write about, that will take absolute top priority.

“Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try” – John F. Kennedy (1917‑1963)

I still have a question, which I kinda covered in my October 2024 article, ‘CRAVE Guitars Writing: An Introspective Inquiry’, so apologies for the reprise. Does anyone read the articles and are they worth doing? Now that is a very difficult pair of questions to answer. As far as stats go, it seems as though the volume of readership is very, very small. So, if the audience is so tiny, why bother? Ultimately, I do it because I want to write about these things, not because I want other people to read them (believe it or not) – there is a distinction, honest. As for the perceived intellectual or entertainment value deriving from the process, that is really not up to me to judge. I am self‑critical and I set myself very high standards but that doesn’t mean that what I write has any merit. Fundamentally, whether the content is ‘good’ or ‘bad’ has absolutely nothing to do with numbers reading something and, ultimately, valuing it. I don’t believe that there is an undeniable correlation.

Article writing is not ‘fun’ and it requires a substantial amount of work for zero return but, for some unknown reason, I feel compelled to do it anyway. I have tried over and over again to fathom where that compulsion comes from and, so far, I have failed to quantify the subjective cost/benefit attributes of doing it. I view writing in all its forms as work, regardless of whether the output is woefully under‑appreciated (Ed: a bit like paid work then!).

Will I run out of material? Yes, I will. Eventually. At which time, I will admit scraping an empty barrel (and mixing metaphors), accept it, and stop writing, rather than labour the point with disappointingly diminishing returns. Until then, it is business‑as‑usual. Whether the famine of inspiration dries up before article 200, we’ll just have to wait and see. At the current rate of one article per month, 100 articles takes 8 years, 4 months. That equates to mid‑2034 for article 200 ceteris paribus, so you might have to wait awhile to be certain. Having just passed one milestone, it is time to move onto the next goal; the journey starts here folks, with article (not room) #101 (NB. Room 101 was the torture chamber within Oceania’s Ministry of Love in which a prisoner’s worst fear was manifested, as described in the classic dystopian novel, ‘1984’ (1949) by George Orwell).

“Without a plan, even the most brilliant business can get lost. You need to have goals, create milestones and have a strategy in place to set yourself up for success” – Yogi Berra (1925‑2015)


Final Thoughts on the First 100 Articles

I want to stress at this point that I am not in any way an ‘influencer’ and I do not want to be whatever one of those is. I am not trying to be clever or to influence anyone and have zero ambition to be thus labelled. Unlike many is such a role, I do not have the right to preach. Just to be clear.

So then, one might ask, what am I? Just a regular nerdy old dude is the answer. Oh, and with the hurly‑burly The CRAVEman as my alter ego, guitar god and all round superhero. Duh! (NB. Hurly‑burly is an English ‘reduplicated phrase’ originating in the 16th Century, as in the translation from Latin of, ‘The Despisyng of the Worlde’ (1532) by Christian theologian, Erasmus (1466‑1536)).

I believe I have two fundamental contrasting outputs. One is diligently researched factual objectivity regarding vintage guitars, basses, effects and amps, as well as a passion for contemporary musicology. The other is subjective flights of fanciful fictional escapism. ‘The CRAVEman’ and ‘The Distortion Diaries’ both fall into the latter category.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step” – Laozi (6th Century BCE)

The writing process varies considerably depending on what is being covered. Frequent short social media posts, infrequent long monthly blog articles, feature pages for vintage gear on the website and, of course, the long-gestating fictional novel. I strive very hard to be adequately competent at all four, which can be quite challenging while also attempting to eke out an everyday existence in this inexplicably irrational world. Ever the idealist.

Some of this I’ve mentioned before; so please forgive the repetition. So, what is my motivation? Why do I work SO hard at CRAVE Guitars et al? It certainly isn’t for pecuniary reward – there is none. Nada. Zilch. Rien. Nichts. Well, I’d like to be remembered for something, in terms of a lasting legacy. Such a legacy, however, requires sufficient numbers of people to recognise something to differentiate someone from all the other someones, who are possibly seeking similar somethings (if you get my intentionally convoluted drift!).

Will CRAVE Guitars ever realise some recognisable measure of success? I’m not getting into a definition of ‘success’ here. It hasn’t yet. Nothing happens overnight, right? Well CRAVE Guitars has been around for nineteen years and online for twelve. I don’t think it’s going to take off now, so I am resigned to a modest profile, which is OK, as I don’t actually sell anything. I am ambitious but I also recognise when something has reached its practicable equilibrium. Ever the optimist.

“We are what we do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit” – Aristotle (384‑322BCE)

I am, sadly, not privileged with an abundance of wealth, which is something that so many worthless people rely on to make themselves visible (and vacuous). It is SO hard to be good at something different, as there is SO little original thought or action these days. Hard work does ≠ appreciable success. I do not seek fame and the idea of ‘celebrity’ status is a total anathema to me. It would be nice, though, if there is some hard‑earned recognition for my efforts. I certainly do not want to be like everyone else and I am content with my harmless and unique misanthropic deviance from societal norms. However, all that is simply not enough in 2026, with nearly 9 billion souls on the planet, all wanting ‘more’ of everything. Greed and avarice are repugnant traits of innumerable immoral individuals. Ever the humblest.

One thing is for sure, I have every intention to carry on writing articles until the time comes when I can no longer do so, for whatever reason. I hope you’ll find that encouraging. I would like to understand what readers would like to see in terms of content. If anyone wishes to suggest relevant material, I would welcome it and, perhaps, even see whether I can do a good job at it, as a challenge.

I don’t usually believe in coincidences but publishing the 100th article just happened to coincide with publishing the 200th page on the web site.

“Listing your personal milestones is like storing a pocketful of sunshine for a rainy day. Sometimes our best is simply not enough…. We have to do what is required” – Winston Churchill (1874‑1965)


A Short Update on ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Reflecting on the past decade of article writing for CRAVE Guitars got me thinking again about my work‑in‑progress side project. With ‘The Distortion Diaries’, (TDD for short – not the International Airport Code for Trinidad), I have only latterly come to realise just why the novel is dissimilar from my other writing and why it has become so important to me. It may be blooming obvious but it simply hadn’t occurred to me.

“Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished” – Laozi (6th Century BCE)

Until now, excepting all my past writing as part of my paid profession, my unpaid amateur writing over the past decade or so has been available entirely via Internet‑based channels, such as web site features, blog articles and social media. Surprise, surprise, they are all digital media, only accessible on that thar hinterwebby thingummy. Thus far, nothing actually tangible.

‘The Distortion Diaries’ is, I believe, different. I want TDD to be read (primarily) in traditional physical book form, something palpable for people to hold, printed with ink on paper, one of mankind’s oldest means of widely sharing ideas, imagination and knowledge. TDD has the potential to become an expression of my creative spirit. Somehow, more ‘real’, genuine and authentic simply because of its physicality. Perhaps, this explains why I do not want TDD to become just another random record of an online opus made up entirely of binary ‘1’s and ‘0’s. How very ‘old school’ (NB. The term, ‘old school’ may originate from a pamphlet, ‘The Reply of the Country Gentleman to the Answer of His Military Arguments’ (1758) by Thomas Potter).

“The goal, and the ultimate achievement, is to make people feel as well as think” – Saul Bass (1920‑1996)

I desperately hope that someone, somewhere may (eventually) get to read The Distortion Diaries and it may even have the power to change their life, just a tiny little bit. This is an earnest wish. This epiphany is very recent and quite illuminating (and possibly a touch conceited). Apologies (again) for the soul bearing.

As final editing of TDD edges closer, any external assistance guiding me through the self‑publishing process that results in an actual physical book would be very gratefully received. A production run will be very low numbers, at least initially.

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us” – Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803‑1882)


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’

Much has been said in CRAVE Guitars articles about my predilection for reggae, particularly roots and dub reggae. Most of the genre derived from the small Caribbean island of Jamaica during the 1970s. However, the ‘Windrush Generation’ (NB. named after the passenger ship HMT Empire Windrush in 1948) resulted in immigrants from the West Indies arriving in the UK from the 1940s to the 1970s. This influx meant that a significant Caribbean influence was present in the communities of major British cities such as London, Birmingham and Bristol. This vibrant culture led to a surge in British reggae built on the back of Jamaican popularity and the global phenomenon that was Bob Marley. Often overlooked, British reggae at its best was on a par with reggae from further afield. Consequentially, this month’s accolade goes to…

Pablo Gad – Trafalgar Square (1979):

Pablo Gad was born in Jamaica (date not known) and moved to the United Kingdom in 1974. He toured regularly with the London‑based reggae band Black Slate, becoming one of the most socially conscious and often outspoken UK‑based roots reggae singers. In 1979, he released his debut solo studio album, ‘Trafalgar Square’. The current CD release of the album on Secret Records comprises 11 tracks over 50 minutes including his most well‑known track, ‘Blood Suckers’ in both vocal and dub versions. It’s not a challenging listen and it may not be an exemplar of the genre but it stands out to my ears.

Pablo Gad may not be a familiar name to those whose interest lies mainly in mainstream pop reggae. However, ‘Trafalgar Square’ is, in my opinion, a hidden gem of the effervescent British reggae movement in the 1970s and 1980s. There are plenty of UK reggae artists and bands to discover, should you be so inclined. There is a growing interest in conserving the important musical heritage of that period with several homespun record labels dedicated to the task. Great stuff, worth checking out as complementary to the wealth of authentic Jamaican reggae.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” – Eleanor Roosevelt (1884‑1962)


Tailpiece

Well, that’s the first article of 2026 done and dusted. For next month, I think I will be returning to a back‑to‑basics article. That will rely on some preparatory work to be done before I can confirm. I hope you’ll come back to visit at the end of February to find out what’s in prospect. In the meantime, the nagging ‘call of stuff’ beckons.

“The moon is the first milestone on the road to the stars” – Arthur C. Clarke (1917‑2008)

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. The CRAVEman, signing off for now. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “I don’t pray for a miracle. I pray that we become wise enough that we do not need miracles”

© 2026 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


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December 2025 – It’s That Time of Year Again: CRAVE Guitars 2025 in Review

posted in: Event, News, Observations, Opinion | 0

Prelude

FESTIVE FELICITATIONS FINE FAIR FOLK. Maybe it is just a little too late to celebrate Christmas (or alternative) and just a little too early to celebrate New Year but generous greetings nevertheless. To be honest, I don’t like winter and I’m definitely in the humbuggian camp (NB. “Bah! Humbug!”, an exclamation uttered by the character Ebenezer Scrooge in Charles Dickens’ novella, ‘A Christmas Carol’ (1843)). A brief lull in activity at the end of an arduous calendar year (atrociously called ‘Twixmas’ by some) is, though, an opportunity to take a temporary time out from seasonal periodic pecuniary profligacy and reflect on things that really matter.

So, you may ask, what really matters? The answer to that thorny little question is probably different for every soul on the planet. For me, it is a determined attempt to improve our shared communities and to reject all that is wrong with our society. We all have a duty to sustain the good and to dispel the bad. We must not abrogate our responsibilities by assuming that it is up to others to benefit us. Humanity definitely needs better humans and it is the duty of all (well, most) of us to realise that hope. How long will good people look on and do nothing?

I also cannot let this article or this year slip into history without the usual earnest plea to work relentlessly for a better world. We should look after our ecological environment by respecting nature in all its precious diversity. It’s the only one we’ve got. We should look after our crumbling civilisation through renewed integrity, honesty and by securing a determined path to peace, security and harmony. You may think these ‘big picture’ aspirations are pretentious hogwash or maybe not. They are, though, what I believe. Didactic sermonising over… for now.

All the quotes (bar the usual CRAVE quote at the end) this month are all drawn from the vast well of wisdom that is the teachings of the Buddha (Siddhārtha Gautama – c.480‑400BCE). After more than two millennia, there is still a great deal that we can learn from the Buddha to help us cope with the modern world. NB. Buddha literally means “the awakened one”. The quotes used are some of those that resonate with my personal cultural frame of reference and which suit the tone of the article. These words are not about religion or faith; they are messages of wisdom and truth.

Buddha (Siddhartha Gautama c.480-400BCE)

“I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act” – Buddha

I know it’s predictable at this time of year and some may see it as an easy article to publish. However, it still takes a fair amount of time and effort to produce. As with previous years, the format of the article remains relatively static. If it ain’t broke ‘n’ all that. This is probably one for the list‑o‑philes out there. No AI was used in researching or writing this article. AI was, however, used to prepare The CRAVEman images – it is the only way I can bring him to an audience.

As the shutters of 2025 draw to a close, the door of 2026 is opening. Our friendly neighbourhood guitar god, The CRAVEman recognises that this is a time for change with, “The End (of the Year) is Nigh. Grunt!”

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live the present moment wisely and earnestly” – Buddha


Some of those that left the building in 2025 (41):

It is that part of the annual review that is always a sobering and melancholy section. My goodness what a shockingly bad year 2025 has been for those departing this mortal coil. A horrendous amount of loss. Not only the sheer number of souls but also the immense contribution they made to our culture and society while alive and rocking.

“Even death is not to be feared by one who lived wisely” – Buddha

The inevitable obituary list comprises too many artists that have provided humanity with some truly great music over many decades. They were all with us at the start of the year and are sadly no longer with us at the year’s end. Our thanks, respect and admiration go to the following, may you Rock In Peace (RIP).

Date Died

Name

Of…

Born

Age

1 January

Wayne Osmond

Osmond Brothers

1951

73

10 January

Sam Moore

Sam & Dave

1935

89

15 January

David Lynch

Film director and composer

1946

78

30 January

Marianne Faithfull

Singer and actress

1946

78

24 February

Roberta Flack

Singer and pianist

1937

88

28 February

David Johansen

New York Dolls

1950

75

11 March

Cocoa Tea (a.k.a. Calvin Scott)

Dancehall reggae singer

1959

65

5 April

Dave Allen

Gang Of Four

1955

69

6 April

Clem Burke

Blondie

1954

70

11 April

Max Romeo (a.k.a. Maxwell Livingston Smith)

Reggae singer

1944

80

15 May

Junior Byles (a.k.a. Kenneth Byles Jr.)

Reggae singer

1948

77

26 May

Rick Derringer

Guitarist The McCoys

1947

77

9 June

Sly Stone (a.k.a. Sylvester Stewart)

Sly & The Family Stone

1943

82

11 June

Brian Wilson

The Beach Boys

1942

82

20 June

Patrick Walden

Babyshambles

1978

46

23 June

Mick Ralphs

Mott The Hoople/Bad Company

1944

81

26 June

Lalo Schiffrin

Film & TV composer

1932

93

11 July

Vic Savage (a.k.a. David Kaff)

Spinal Tap

1946

79

13 July

David Cousins (a.k.a. David Hinson)

The Strawbs

1940

85

16 July

Connie Francis

Pop singer

1937

87

22 July

Ozzy Osbourne (a.k.a. John Michael Osbourne)

Black Sabbath/solo

1948

76

24 July

Cleo Laine (a.k.a. Clementine Bullock)

Singer and actress

1927

97

20 August

Brent Hinds

Mastodon

1974

51

6 September

Rick Davies

Supertramp

1944

81

8 September

Allen Blickle

Baroness

1983

42

16 September

Tomas Lindberg

At The Gates

1972

52

23 September

Danny Thompson

Richard Thompson/John Martyn

1939

86

25 September

Chris Dreja

Yardbirds

1945

79

28 September

Steve Whalley

Slade/Sad Café

1950

75

10 October

John Lodge

Moody Blues

1943

82

16 October

Ace Frehley

KISS

1951

74

18 October

Sam Rivers

Limp Bizkit

1977

48

22 October

Dave Ball

Soft Cell/The Grid

1959

66

20 November

Gary ‘Mani’ Mounfield

Stone Roses/Primal Scream

1962

63

24 November

Jimmy Cliff (a.k.a. James Chambers)

Singer and actor

1944

81

3 December

Steve Cropper

Booker T. & The M.G.’s

1941

84

15 December

Joe Ely

Country singer/songwriter

1947

78

19 December

Mick Abrahams

Jethro Tull/Blodwyn Pig

1943

82

22 December

Chris Rea

Pop/blues singer/songwriter and guitarist

1951

74

24 December

Perry Bamonte

The Cure

1960

65

Also, notorious convicted paedophile Ian Watkins, former member of Lost Prophets, b.1977, was murdered on 11 October while in prison, aged 48.

These are just a few of the more famous/familiar names. There have been many other deaths in the music industry, far too many to mention. CRAVE Gutiars’ thoughts go out to all who have been affected by loss during 2025.

“Life is uncertain; death is certain” – Buddha


CRAVE Guitars Vintage Gear purchased in 2025 (11)

It hasn’t been a great year for CRAVE Guitars’ acquisitions. The cause was partly threefold. The first was a general lack of funds in a challenging economic climate. I think most readers will have been negatively impacted to some extent by the on‑going economic ‘cost of living crisis’, low growth, high inflation/interest rates, etc. The second was simply a lack of space at home in which to keep the extended family of guitars, basses, effects and amps. The third is a limited supply of interesting candidates keen to obtain the CRAVE Guitars badge of honour.

“Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have” – Buddha

However, there was a modicum of ‘new’ old gear to celebrate in 2025 (with links to existing features where applicable at the time of writing – each opens a new tab).

Guitars & Bass:
1966 Fender Electric XII
1984 Guild X‑79 Skyhawk
1983 Kramer ‘The Duke’ Deluxe Bass

Effect Pedals:
1990 DOD FX50‑B Overdrive Plus
1992 DOD FX52 Classic Fuzz
1991 DOD FX54 Attacker (compression/distortion)
1988 DOD FX65 Stereo Chorus
1988 DOD FX80‑B Compressor Sustainer
1980 MXR Micro Chorus
1975 MXR Noise Gate Line Driver
1977 MXR Phase 90 (‘Block Logo’)

Plus:
Non‑vintage guitar case for the 1966 Fender Electric XII
Vintage guitar case for the Guild X‑79 Skyhawk

“An idea that is developed and put into action is more important than an idea that exists only as an idea” – Buddha

The keen sighted among you may notice that there are three additions to the CRAVE Effects family that date from 1990‑1992. This prima facie undermines one of CRAVE Guitars’ ‘rules of attraction’ that has, to‑date, relied on an arbitrary cut‑off of 1989 as ‘vintage’ for many years. This ‘rule’ is basd on the manufacturing techniques used for guitars, basses and amps, as well as to effect pedals. Automation introduced increased levels of consistency and accuracy that tended to dilute all the quirks and idiosyncrasies that make vintage gear so fascinating and desirable. In some ways, the ‘1989 rule’ has already been broken by many of the modern guitar cases that protect genuine vintage guitars in the absence of original hard shell cases.

However, as we move into 2026, I feel more and more inclined to re‑assess and stretch that 1989 rule, starting with the effects listed above. The ‘1989 rule’ still applies to guitars, basses and amps, although I anticipate that the rule may well be relaxed there too in due course. I certainly have some gear from the 1990s that feel ‘vintage’ to me. If one takes the 25‑year baseline for describing ‘vintage’, then everything from the 1990s could now be included. However, if one takes a 30‑year baseline, it would include gear from the first half of the 1990s but exclude the latter half of the decade. Both baselines are widely publicised as a means of determining what is or isn’t ‘vintage’. Irritatingly, there really is no definitive answer and this isn’t the place to resurrect that particular debate (yet again).

I think the answer to this particular conundrum is for CRAVE Guitars to evaluate the validity of ‘vintage’ gear on a case‑by‑case basis. This means that there will be no absolute ‘1989 rule’ going forward but it is way too premature to introduce a ‘1999 rule’. Personally, I detest such a lack of clarity, however one also has to be pragmatic and realistic. Let’s see how things go in 2026. I think that passing the milestone into the second quarter of the 21st Century is an appropriate time to test CRAVE Guitars’ fundamental operating principles.

In the meantime, the feature articles accompanying the five DOD FX series effect pedals mentioned above aren’t on the website… yet. The features should appear under the CRAVE Effects part of the website early in 2026 when all the content has been prepared. Only some links to follow at the moment (see above). Keep an eye on the website in due course.

“Do not overrate what you have received, nor envy others. He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind” – Buddha


2025 album releases purchased (6):

There seems to be a trend to this article. Too many passed away, too little vintage gear and it continues with too few 2025 album releases purchased.

One of the weird outcomes from COVID‑19 (2020‑) is that there was a surge in creativity that seemed at odds with the pandemic’s effect on social and cultural affairs. That inspirational ingenuity lasted until last year, give or take a few months. This year, though, seems to have been the trough after the peak. Either that or I’m missing something important. The tangible result is that I only bought six 2025 albums. Of those, one was a remix album and another was a compilation of tracks from c.1970.

“Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared” – Buddha

I keep looking for new music but this year, that search has been a bit of a thankless task. Perhaps you’ve fared better. I hope so. Anyhoo… the measly six were:

  • The Cure – Mixes Of A Lost World Deluxe
  • Cymande – Renascence
  • Dub Spencer & Trance Hill – Synchronous
  • The Mighty Rootsmen – The Mighty Rootsmen
  • Omar Perry – Channelling Lee “Scratch” Perry
  • Various Artists – Lee “Scratch” Perry & Friends – Land Of Kinks: The Jamaican Upsetter Singles 1970

Of course, quantity does not necessarily equate to quality. However, a healthy equilibrium is undoubtedly a preferred state of affairs, I think you’ll agree. I sincerely hope that 2026 is a more productive and fruitful year for new recorded music.

“Fashion your life as a garland of beautiful deeds” – Buddha


2025 Gigs (2)

Well, this is getting tediously repetitive. It was also a bad year for attending concerts with only two notable gigs in 2025. Like many, I enjoy live music and it is generally being regarded as the saviour of creative music amid the blandness of corporate commercial crap put out by ‘the industry’. The choice of artist was largely down to my son, a die‑hard metalhead. I am always open to new music and new experiences so I happily went with the flow.

  • Cattle Decapitation (support: Shadow Of Intent, Revocation, Vulvodynia) January 2025
  • The Birthday Massacre (support: Lesbian Bed Death, Diamond Black) November 2025
Cattle Decapitation
The Birthday Massacre

The sentiment about new recorded music is reiterated here about live music in 2025. It is such an important component of the vitality and vibrancy that underpins the musical landscape. We need to support it, as well as enjoy it.

KEEP MUSIC LIVE!

“Through zeal, knowledge is gotten; through lack of zeal, knowledge is lost” – Buddha


CRAVE Guitars’ Web Site

During 2025, there have been many changes to the web site. The visual aesthetic has not changed and I think the look remains fresh and stylish. The overall structure also hasn’t really changed either. However, the content is continually updated or new material is added when there is something new to include, improve or amend. Many visitors may not notice the changes but they are there. More to come in 2026.

CRAVE (Cool & Rare American Vintage Electric) Guitars

“Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others” – Buddha

I have been pushing CRAVE Guitars relatively hard for a part‑time amateur and that shows in the web site statistics. Visitors struggled to show an increase in traffic over the previous year (2024) but this year (2025) has shown a significant increase in visitors. I am not certain why this may be. I don’t think it is down to the many minor changes or new content on the site. I don’t think it’s because of the monthly articles, as they haven’t changed in frequency. I don’t think it’s because of social media activity, although that has been consistent and focused over the last 12 months.

“In the sky, there is no distinction between east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then believe them to be true” – Buddha

The total number of visitors (at the time of writing) in 2025 was 70,333, while in 2024 it was 43,176, an increase of 27,157 (38.6%). The number of visitors hasn’t changed significantly year‑on‑year but the number of views has. From my perspective, I don’t know if this is good or bad – it is just a number without comparable context. While 70,333 seems high to me, it only equates to just over 192 visits per day. I am, however, encouraged by the growth of interest in CRAVE Guitars as a ‘thing’ and what it stands for. I am also encouraged by unsolicited feedback, for which I am extremely grateful. One thing is certain, 2025’s achievements will be very hard to beat in 2026, especially without a lot more content and different ways of looking at it.

“I never see what has been done; I only see what remains to be done” – Buddha


CRAVE Guitars’ Social Media

As mentioned above, social media output has been consistent across most platforms (Facebook, X, Instagram, LinkedIn, Pinterest, Bluesky Social and Flickr). I vehemently refuse to use TikTok on political security principles. I post content most days with at least one each day. The exception is that I haven’t posted much on Tumblr during the year. Due to issues over copyright that arose in 2020, I now only post my own material and nothing off Google Images as others do. This is limiting but manageable.

“The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows” – Buddha

The newbie in CRAVE Guitars’ social media output is Bluesky Social, chosen as an alternative and competitor to X. I still post to X despite my anathema for its owner, simply because that is where CRAVE Guitars has its largest following. That following on X has remained largely static or even declining slightly, hovering at just over 6,500 all year, which suggests that social media interest isn’t growing in the same way as the website and there is little or no interdependence between the two. Bluesky Social, on the other hand is building followers from scratch on a relatively under‑used platform at the time of writing – CRAVE has less than 100 followers at year’s end (88 to be exact). There is also not a great deal of vintage guitar content generally on Bluesky Social as at the end of 2025, something that I’m working to improve.

CRAVE Guitars Blue Sky Social

“Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule” – Buddha


Contact Update

The web site e‑mail address is constantly inundated with innumerable prospective messages from all sorts of ‘businesses’ offering the world. My blanket policy is never, ever to respond to such egregious unsolicited communications, even if I wanted such services – which I don’t! Their e‑mails are usually lazy and amateur at best. Even worse, they keep contacting me back, seemingly somewhat surprised and querying why they haven’t heard from me. Then, they start chasing me, like I owe them something. What the…?

The ‘contact’ page on the website is absolutely clear about my position…
“Please note that I will not respond at all to any unwanted spam or unsolicited messages from web design, SEO, sales or job speculators. While I am tolerant, I will not be taken in by such a crude and blatant lack of professionalism and respect. I won’t hassle you and waste your time, so please don’t do it to me.”

Judging by site stats, CRAVE Guitars seems to be doing very nicely without their questionable ‘expertise’. If they took just a few seconds to check my website (which they often suggest has been thoroughly evaluated and audited), they would be aware that I will not give them the time of day. If they can be bothered to get my e‑mail address, my contemptuous silence should be expected without question. To each and every one of these abhorrent time wasters, RTFM (of sorts) and [deleted] off!!! Genuine contact only, people.

“Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth” – Buddha


The Distortion Diaries Update

There has been little material progress since the August article. Follow the link below for the most recent published update (opens in a new tab).

August 2025 – ‘The Distortion Diaries’: A Teaser Trailer

Having said that, there is certainly a very strong determination to bring Terry Wilder’s story to the world, as well as that of his band, The Imaginary Transtemporal Affair (TITA) and the Women in his gravitational field. Terry really wants to jump off the page and meet y’all.

Work on the book’s narrative is on‑going, not necessarily as a coherent approach. I write notes every day for possible inclusion in the final version. I am certainly not short of ideas or material. It just needs sustained intense focus, which is not very easy fitting in on a day‑to‑day living basis. However, I am resolute to undertake a major edit/rewrite of The Distortion Diaries in 2026 and, hopefully, get it out there for everyone to judge. All two of you! Lol! Still, the point is that I must try harder.

“The secret of happiness is not in doing what one likes, but in liking what one does” – Buddha


State of the Music Industry and the Vintage Guitar Market

Commensurate with other observations concerning 2025, I am sad to report that there appears to be a continual and irrevocable decline overall. Well‑known retailers in the UK have gone to the wall and the outlook for those that remain looks bleak. Almost every week, some relevant business goes to the wall. Many sellers seem to have abandoned physical outlets and have retreated to the Internet for sales in order to cut the operational costs of bricks and mortar retail property. This trend is deeply disappointing and potentially terminal for many businesses trying hard to eke out a living. Tragically, the best one might hope for in 2026 might well be a low plateau of stagnation. Not a good place to be.

“There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting” – Buddha

One recent stark example: Long‑standing guitar manufacturers are not immune to the harsh times. Sadly, the German company Höfner recently filed for bankruptcy. Höfner was founded in 1887 by German luthier Karl Höfner in what is now the Czech Republic. Unfortunately, longevity doesn’t ward off inevitable decline. Sigh.

In the UK, names like Professional Music Technology (PMT), Guitar Amp & Keyboard Centre (GAK) and Black Dog Music all went out of business in 2025 and that’s just the tip of the very precipitous iceberg.

“Everything changes, nothing remains without change” – Buddha

The state of the vintage guitar market remains unpredictably volatile. Over the last decade, there has been very little in the way of supply and what there is attracts undeservedly high prices – the unfortunate consequence of economic supply and demand. Collector interest seems staunchly conservative with the safe ‘classics’ attracting constant value (and therefore investment) increases, while the rest (i.e. the ones in which CRAVE Guitars is most interested) vary significantly with quality and values all over the place. It looks like 2026 is going to be another unpredictable year.

It isn’t just vintage guitars affected, the impact also covers vintage basses, effects and amps, as well as for parts and accessories. Not only have I been forced to buy less due to funding constraints but also there is less good quality product available at a reasonable price to tempt buying activity. I cannot see this changing any time soon.

“Those who are free of resentful thoughts surely find peace” – Buddha

The UK market has shrunk into insular isolation. Disastrous Brexit consequences have pretty much prohibited purchasing anything from the EU. Trade uncertainty and restrictions (yes, you, USA) mean that transatlantic purchasing is simply no longer economic. So the story goes onward. If the negative effects impact CRAVE Guitars, it is far, far worse for businesses trying to make a living.

As mentioned above, the recording and performance side of the industry seems to be going through a patch of post‑COVID creative doldrums. No‑one wants another pandemic.

Clearly a ‘perfect storm’ of global trade instability, pointlessly destructive military conflict, political mayhem, social insecurity and cultural conservatism are just some of the interweaving impactful influences going on here.

Strategically, businesses will face a very challenging operating environment as we move into 2026. Moreover, it is going to be difficult to evaluate and implement options for a successful medium‑long‑term future strategically, tactically and operationally. I know that sounds depressingly negative. I don’t want it to be. However, it is hard to see much in the way of light at the end of the current tunnel.

“Change is never painful, only the resistance to change is painful” – Buddha


Seasonal Greetings from The CRAVEman

The CRAVEman wishes all readers a belated Merry Christmas and a premature Happy New Year. The CRAVEman has issued two portraits for you to end the year, one for each seasonal celebration. Grunt!

The CRAVEman Merry Christmas
The CRAVEman Happy New Year

“Teach this triple truth to all: a generous heart, kind speech, and a life of service and compassion are the things that renew humanity” – Buddha


Final Thoughts on 2025 and Looking Forward to 2026

While many of my layman observations seem negative, it is with deluded confidence that one has to look forward to the New Year and the potential opportunities it provides. If only irrational optimism and positivity was a self‑fulfilling prophecy, then we’d all be in a much better place. Hope springs eternal (NB. An idiom that derives from the poem, ‘An Essay on Man’ (1733) by Alexander Pope (1688‑1744)).

I would like to take this opportunity to say a big “Thank You” to everyone who has had anything to do with CRAVE Guitars over the last 12 months. If it wasn’t for y’all, there wouldn’t be a CRAVE Guitars, there’d be no point. So, it seems, we must now welcome in the New Year. We can’t avoid it, so we might as well go with the flow and take 2026 as it comes. As American poet Ogden Nash (1902‑1971) once said, “Duck! Here comes another year!”

Given the tonal balance that this yearly review has set out, I shall not make things any worse by continuing with the negativity. Nuff said then. Bring on 2026!

“Have compassion for all beings, rich and poor alike; each has their suffering. Some suffer too much, others too little” – Buddha


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month (and Year)’

Last year, CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’ was also the ‘Album of the Year’. Despite the paucity of material from which to draw, I am going for the ‘sequel’ to last year’s pick. This year’s Blue Riband award (NB. An accolade given to the passenger liner that achieved the fastest recorded crossing of the Atlantic Ocean from Europe to America – held by the SS United States (1952). Now a term more widely used to signify distinction and excellence) goes to…

The Cure – Mixes of a Lost World: After far too long without a studio album, 2024 saw the long‑awaited release of ‘Songs of a Lost World’. While it wasn’t quite up with ‘Pornography’ (1982) or my favourite all‑time studio album, ‘Disintegration’ (1989), it was a monumental achievement for Robert Smith and the band.

While many decry ‘remix’ albums, I actually appreciate the best of them, albeit being a mixed bag overall. The 3‑CD deluxe edition of ‘Mixes of a Lost World’, released in June 2025 on Universal, comprises 24 remixes of tracks covering 148 minutes. The original album tracks have been remixed by a wide variety of credible artists including Four Tet, Paul Oakenfold, Orbital, Daniel Avery, Craven Faults, 65daysofstatic, The Twilight Sad, Mogwai and many others. Some of these are traditional variations on a theme, while several take a more radical approach of genre‑shifting immersive soundscapes. To be honest, it was a far better album that it could have been, so kudos to The Cure for being bold and not resting on well‑earned laurels.

The Cure – Mixes Of A Lost World (2025)

In addition, all royalties from the sale of the album, go to War Child, a charity supporting children directly affected by war and conflict. They also challenge the unethical and unscrupulous tactics of ‘dynamic pricing’ for live concert tickets and despicably immoral scalping outlets. Thank goodness there are still some sincere philanthropic artists in the industry. Well done The Cure.

There is also a live version, ‘Songs of a Live World’ and a cinematic version of the live concert, ‘Show Of A Live World’. The album goes to prove that The Cure is a band still innovating, challenging preconceptions and delivering the goods. Thanks Robert.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“The world indeed is like a dream and the treasures of the world are an alluring mirage like the apparent distances in a picture. Things have no reality in themselves but are like heat haze” – Buddha


Tailpiece

Well, I think we can all probably agree that 2025 was generally a mix of ups and downs for everyone, so let us bid adieu to it. It seems that the worst of the Covid‑19 pandemic is behind us; largely gone but not forgotten. Hopefully, though there has been an opportunity to value and appreciate the good fortunes that we are able to enjoy. We should not underestimate just what the benefits of peacetime and freedom mean in our culture.

“Better than a thousand hollow words, is one word that brings peace” – Buddha

Let us look forward to 2026 and make it the best 2026 that we can achieve. To build a safe, secure and prosperous civilisation, we have to unite to eradicate hatred, conflict and division. Nobody is saying it is easy but it is worth it and good only comes from unwavering endeavour. For me, I’m already thinking about CRAVE Guitars’ article content for next year. No peace for the wicked (NB. A phrase derived and adapted from the Book of Isiah in the Christian Bible). Rock on 2026!

“What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: our life is the creation of our mind” – Buddha

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. The CRAVEman, signing off for now. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “Great music cleanses one’s spirit, washes away one’s pain and removes the dirt that obscures one’s harmony with the universe”

© 2025 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


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August 2025 – ‘The Distortion Diaries’: A Teaser Trailer

posted in: Event, Fiction, Introduction, News | 0

Prelude

HEYYY, YO, WASSUP, HI Y’ALL, G’DAY, SALUTATIONS, howdy‑doody, henlo, aloha, Namaste, how’s it hangin’, salut, top o’ the morning, salaam, hey there, ahoy, ‘ello, ciao, greetings, etc. One hopes you’re all chipper this late August 2025 (NB. The first documented use of the noun ‘chipper’, meaning upbeat and cheerful, is from the ‘Boke of Keruynge’ (1508) – The Book of Carving – by publisher Wynkyn de Worde, a Tudor handbook for how to behave at court). Nowt to do with contemporary man‑eating wood chippers a la the film, ‘Fargo’ (1996) or even, ‘Tucker & Dale Vs Evil’ (2010)! I digress, as usual. Good to know some things never change. I bid you welcome, once more.

I was tempted to rant on (again) about the dire state of global politics and conflicts. However, I felt another polemic could disproportionately and negatively affect the overall tone of the article, so I will refrain. Regular readers will already know my views, so there is little to be gained from restating them here (again). Peace & Love, people.

This month’s article bears no direct relation to last month’s introduction of ‘The CRAVEman Cometh’ spinoff. However, there is a tenuous parallel in the pure imaginary creations of the contorted cavities of CRAVEs creative cerebellum. The subject matter this month is not entirely new but it is an expansion of previously hinted at material. It is also only tangentially relevant to vintage guitars, which means I am continuing on a fictional summer sabbatical at CRAVE Guitars for the second month running. Apologies to vintage guitar aficionados.

For this article, I return to the subject of the draft novel, ‘The Distortion Diaries’. Given that the potential book is the focus of this article, there deserves to be quite a bit of new material to explore. Expect a plentiful portion of pompous prose.

“For aren’t memories the true ghosts of our lives?” – Stephen King (1947)


Previously… on ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Several times now, I have intimated in the public domain that there was the potential for a fictional vanity side project. This was first implied at, way back in December 2023. At that time I wrote… “I felt an irresistible urge to write a fiction novel. Its status is currently work‑in‑progress. It will be called, ‘The Distortion Diaries’ (remember, you read it here first).” So, here we are, some 20 months on and the evolution of the tome is probably best be described as slow but steady.

However, while the novel has been referenced in subsequent articles, it has not yet been the main focus of a blog. So, I thought this month I would set the matter straight and take another brief diversion from the world of vintage guitars and put this long‑gestating idea centre stage. Why? Because I can.

In order to give the book’s narrative a bit more authenticity, I embarked on writing my own journal (well over 600 days into the real thing and counting). While there are some notable differences between a journal and a diary, ‘The Distortion Journals’ doesn’t have an alliterative ring to it (and you know how much I like to alliterate). The process of writing about events and random thoughts on a daily basis gives a valuable insight into the fictional diary of the novel’s main character. The rhythm, reflection and routine of writing the real thing helps with the introspective compositional style of the fabricated story. Very method! Pretentious? Most probably but not deliberately.

Back in 2023, I was very used to writing in various forms but, as I quickly found out, a fiction novel is a completely different proposition. Everything I had learned counted for very little. After an intense period of inexperienced book writing during the first half of 2024, the first draft had been completed, if not finished (there is a subtle difference). Then things were put on hold for a considerable period due to other things going on in ordinary life that took priority over writing. It was in October 2024 that I took the bold step to reveal the idea as part of the monthly article published that month. If you want to revisit that article as a preamble to this month’s update, click on the link below (opens in a new tab). In fact, I would recommend reading the relevant part of that blog in order for the rest of this article to make sense, as I don’t want to repeat material from 10 months ago here, unless absolutely necessary for coherency.

October 2024 – CRAVE Guitars Writing: An Introspective Inquiry

For once, all this month’s quotes from here on in are not attributed to real people. Rather they are some of the main character’s observations about life. They may or may not make the cut for the finished product. He likes to think he is wise but an innate creative conceit may mask fallible foolishness. You decide.

In order to make a little bit more time for writing the novel, rather than write about writing the novel, I will try to keep this relatively brief (for me).

“Humans are hopelessly self-destructive. No matter how hard we try, we are addicted to those things that will ultimately destroy us” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


Brief Update on ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Back in October 2024, I suggested that the author’s real name will not be used if the novel ever gets published. Instead, it will be credited to a pseudonym. The nom de plume (NB. literal French for ‘pen name’) has been carefully selected to conceal my identity, gender, location and genre. I am reluctant to reveal my unique pseudonym at this time in case someone else appropriates it before publication. Paranoid? Me?

In last month’s article, I introduced the front man for CRAVE Guitars, The CRAVEman. The objective for CRAVE Guitars is that it is the instruments that deserve the attention, not the proprietor, hence the alter ego. The same applies for The Distortion Diaries – it is the fictional characters that should have all the attention, not the author. In case you were wondering, the book will not be credited to The CRAVEman, although I must admit that I was tempted for a very short moment. Given that his vocabulary extends only as far as “Grunt!”, it didn’t seem appropriate for authorship.

Even though I am writing about it here, my intention is to ensure that CRAVE Guitars and The Distortion Diaries are discrete entities and fully independent of each other, if only to preserve the integrity of both, hence my diffident anonymity. I do not care for either fame or fortune. I just want to be the best me that I can be (d’ya follow?) and that means making CRAVE Guitars and The Distortion Diaries as successful as they can be, even if that success is measured only by the unassertive existence of both, irrespective of me (the only common denominator between the two).

“What mysteries lie in the names we are given? How would our lives be different under another name, another identity?” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)

The book’s cover art has also been prepared in early draft and not finalised. Last time I wrote on the subject, the main narrative was just a standard Microsoft Word document (for functional convenience). The fonts have been chosen, the layout firmed up and the whole thing has now been reformatted in book form. These are all minor but essential administrative tasks.

Artificial Intelligence (AI) has NOT been used in any way for the book’s text – it is 100% my work, for good or bad. For once, though, I concede that AI has been used to prepare the basis for some of the draft images for The Distortion Diaries. Furthermore, AI did not produce the final images, just as a basis for further graphic manipulation. Whether the AI artwork makes it to the final product, we’ll have to wait and see.

So what has or hasn’t changed since October 2024? Fundamentally, not a lot. Sigh. Progress has, however, been made. If it hadn’t, there would be little point in writing this article. Enough expositional preamble. To business…

“The abundance of social company does not prevent the aching loneliness of the individual without a Girlfriend” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


The Main Premise of ‘The Distortion Diaries’

As a reminder, having said that I don’t want to repeat the October 2024 article, the synopsis is an exception to that particular rule. To reiterate, the summary was (and still is):

The Distortion Diaries

Terry plays in a band. He doesn’t have a Girlfriend. He hasn’t had a Girlfriend for some time. Terry has a dreary job in IT. He lives alone with his feline overlord. One day, Terry decides to document his wretched existence in a journal. Rather than the journal reflecting and recording Terry’s lacklustre life, the journal begins to change it. A Lot. Is Terry’s life pre‑determined by fate or is his destiny in his own hands? Only his journal knows.

Based on a false story”

The synopsis remains relevant and unchanged (bar one word), even after a long period of reflection and having survived its first serious edit in April‑May this year (2025). That alone, is encouraging – that the original core idea remains largely unaffected. Thank goodness for small mercies.

I suggested in last year’s article that the book’s genre leaning is “a rom-sex-com-music-bio-mystery-drama-thriller-fantasy about contemporary man’s eternally favourite tripartite – sex, drugs and rock & roll”. Like the synopsis, that also remains unchanged. It is definitely not one for the politically correct woke crowd out there. I reserve the right to express free speech. Don’t agree with it, go read something else.

That’s really all you need to know at the moment. On the surface, the premise seems straightforward enough (a coming‑of‑middle‑age drama) and the structure (a chronological record) is a well‑worn story telling mechanism. So if the proposition and arrangement are (admittedly) clichéd, why bother? What makes this special or different? Why should it stand out from every other decidedly dreary ‘dear diary’ diatribe? Well, it’s the execution of the plot that I hope will entice, amuse, surprise and satisfy.

“I don’t want to be a character in a story, I want to be the storyteller” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


The Main Characters of ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Essentially, the concept revolves around eight individuals living in a fair sized town in the English West Country with the nearest large city being Bristol. The time period covered in the novel is 200 days over the summer of 2012.

The main character, as mentioned above, is Terence Wilder, aged 32. Wilder by name, not by nature. He is an IT specialist working in a dead end job for an anonymous company. Music is Terry’s major motivation in the absence of anything profoundly diverting – like a Girlfriend. He knows that something has to change, so he decides to start recording his life and thoughts in the titular diary. It is only a small change of routine but one that has major repercussions for Terry and those around him.

Terry is a founding member and guitarist with his band called The Imaginary Transtemporal Affair (TITA for short). The band’s name deriving loosely from a line in ‘The Peripheral’ (2014), a novel by ‘cyberpunk’ author, William Gibson (1948‑). The band has been together for a while and the bonds between the members is strong. Terry’s band mates are Xavier (guitar), Hector (bass) and John (drums). The band eschews the easy route of a cover or tribute band and battles with integrity to make their own multi‑/cross‑genre musical style they call HMSPGSALFGGSR (for short!) – you’ll have to read the full narrative to know what it stands for. Their debut studio album, ‘TITA Om Fyah’ is in incubation, as of 2012 (see ‘album of the month’ below).

“I thought of going full mullet. However, I don’t think it would be a good strategy for attracting a Girlfriend” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)

The other three main characters provide the gender counterpoint to the band and, possibly, the catalyst for change. They are Olivia, Dakota and Alley. If you spotted that that only totals seven, you win a gold star. The eighth key character is Terry’s possibly supernatural ginger comrade and confidante, Kwat with whom Terry shares those things he can’t divulge to other humans. If you haven’t already guessed, Terry is Kwat’s human. Kwat exercises total dominion over Terry, just as it should be in the natural order of things.

After undertaking an in‑depth deep FBI‑style psychological analysis of the main characters, I can share with you a detailed profile of each of them. Apologies that the descriptions are so lengthy – these are inherently complex people:

  • Terry – unexceptional
  • Xavier – ambitious
  • Hector – debauched
  • John – mellow
  • Olivia – introverted
  • Dakota – intense
  • Alley – promiscuous
  • Kwat – numinous

OK, so I lied. Sue me. If you want to know more about them, then you’ll just have to wait. Soz. The dynamic interplay between these eight and the tertiary cast provide the core foundation of the yarn. You may get to like them. To say any more at this stage would be to provide too much of an insight into the concept and to render the actual narrative moot. Again, I want to tease you and dangle bait on a proverbial hook, not give everything away for nothing.

That’s really all I want you to know at the moment. The only other miniscule hint I will give away is that I will be manipulating the reader intentionally to subvert expectations (hopefully). All may or may not be what it seems. Beneath the surface, the tale could provide a profound existential observation, it all depends on how you want to approach it.

“I don’t want to be famous, I want to be good” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


The Plot of ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Nah! Not a chance! For the actual details of the storyline, you’ll have to wait and see when it’s completed and, hopefully, published. In the meantime, I will have to keep you on tenterhooks (NB. Not the literal meaning – hooks used to fasten cloth on a drying frame, called a tenter – dates from c.1633. The metaphorical meaning applies – to be in a state of uncomfortable suspense, anticipation or impatience). Let’s hope it will be worth the long wait.

Funnily enough, the conclusion of the story came easily, early on in the process, so I didn’t have to try too hard to fabricate a ham‑fisted finale. Maybe I’m not clever enough to pull off a successful denouement but one has to try, hopefully not in vain.

“Life is not a loser competition” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


Some brief excerpts from ‘The Distortion Diaries’

A special treat for you. The following three brief extracts were taken from relatively early in Terry’s journal entries. I don’t pretend that these are representative, they are just passages taken at sort of random. Due to liberal profanity and potential spoilers, there wasn’t that much that could be used in this article. I hope, though, that you get a sense of the style. Please bear in mind that these are from the first post‑edit draft and may well change (considerably) by the time the completed novel has been put to bed. After this article has been published, I intend to focus on the next substantial edit.

Excerpt from Day 1:

“Nothing happened today. Nothing is going to happen today. Nothing always does. This is my life. My real life. Not some made up life. Well, my life from today onwards. For however long that may be. The future has to start sometime and this journal will testify to my part in it. It is MY unique account, not anyone else’s. What went before is undocumented, available only from a fragile memory residing somewhere between then and the here and now.

This story is my mediocre, futile and fleeting folly of a presence on this small sapphire sphere floating in infinite black nothingness, with just our small saffron sun to warm and illuminate our existence. The 30 trillion or so cells that represent my entire body occupy an infinitesimally small place on this infinitesimally small space pebble.

“Hello Diary” (there, major cliché dispensed with). I bought you a few months ago, intending to fill your vacant leaves with exciting and interesting news about my run‑of‑the‑mill, mediocre life, mixed with the inevitable moments of whimsy, melancholy and pathos. Add oodles of hopefully hilarious humour. Ha‑ha. Don’t forget the counterpoint of joy, that of inevitable tragedy. I wouldn’t be into music if I wasn’t one of those sensitive animals with a severely damaged heart that pours their emotional baggage into the waiting cup of enchanted music.

It’s taken a while to get around to this because, well, that’s just me. I take time to get around to things. It’s not like I’m a professional procrastinator. Honest. I may dawdle a little on occasion but that can conceivably also be a virtue. Possibly.

‘They’ say the best things come to those that wait. That, of course, is bollocks. The best things come to those that go out and grab the great stuff first. The derisory dregs of detritus get left behind for the likes of me, one of the ones that wait. Adult real life, it has to be said, has turned out to be a big disappointment after the false promises of youthful expectation.”

Excerpt from Day 19:

“It was with irrational anticipation that I crawled out of bed feeling decidedly enervated in the outlandish world that is pre‑noon on a werkend. Why? The vain hope of seeing or even meeting the attractive young Lady I sort of ‘encountered’ at Everwax Records last week. As the veil of consciousness lifted, I became increasingly alert, as unheralded adrenalin flowed through my bloodstream. My pulse accelerated, my pupils dilated, my skin tingled and I felt jittery. The innate impulse for fight or flight didn’t seem appropriate. Contrary to my usual cynical demeanour, I was actually looking forward to going out. This is what the lack of a Girlfriend feels like.

Firstly, She might not even go to the record store at all. I have no idea whether She’s even local or not. Secondly, She might go to the shop when I’m not there. Thirdly, even if all the stars aligned and She is there at the same time as me, there is no guarantee that we will engage in any sort of meaningful interaction. Fourthly, and possibly finally, even if that unlikely linear sequence of events actually occurred, there’s no guarantee that such an interaction would prove positive. Having studied logic, probability, statistics and the science of BIG numbers as part of my degree, the odds were stacked heavily against me. However, irrational random anticipation overrules any sort of calculated common sense. Good job I don’t gamble.

And so it turned out. We, the band, dutifully deposited ourselves in Everwax Records at the usual time – the same time that She was there last week – and… She wasn’t there this week.”

Excerpt from Day 32:

“Yay! BIG gig day at The Lost Inn’s ‘dungeon’. I really don’t know why I’m making such a BIG thing out of it. We’ve done loads of gigs before, thirty or forty or so over the last couple of years. By the time we felt that TITA had potential, we already had a few public performances under our collective belts. We hadn’t documented our beginnings very well, which is a shame for my late life autobiography. Best laid plans of hindsight, eh.

I think the reason that this particular gig has gained some extra significance might be because writing about it in my journal helps me to focus and put everything in context. Articulating my thoughts provides me with some clarity previously masked amidst the dissonance of day‑to‑day disorder. Whatever it is that is happening, I am not complaining. Maybe this Diary thing has some motivational value after all.

As usual with gigs, once you get on stage, everything becomes an automatic blur. I can’t remember anything about our playing other than the odd bum note sticking out like a sore thumb (to us). It felt like we executed the whole set list in about five minutes. Actually, it was just over an hour but it felt like five minutes. There was no room for self‑indulgent virtuoso showmanship, it’s all about telepathic togetherness and sonic synergy. The feedback from the audience was pretty good and spurred us on. That’s what it’s all about, the reciprocal energy loop. We were stoked. TITA rules, at least in the moment.”

There you go, three snippets for the price of none. Just for clarity, the misspellings and capitalisation of the excerpts are entirely intentional and are a running theme throughout the full chronicle. You may well recognise the similarity of florid flair when comparing the book extracts with CRAVE Guitars’ articles.

That, I am afraid, is all you’re going to get for now. My motive is to provide a teaser with no obvious giveaways to spoil anything. I can only hope this modest modicum of extracts has marginally piqued your curiosity.

“The unpleasant astringent miasma permeated the empty concert hall at The Lost Inn; sweat, stale beer and a mix of other best-left unidentifiable fluids, saturated every pore” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


The Good News about ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Being positive, the general premise has hardly changed at all. The synopsis hasn’t changed in the slightest. The protagonists have been fleshed out. Also, the first edit proved that the first draft was pretty much on point, a fact that genuinely surprised me.

Another positive is the strength of the character development and the interrelationships between the main characters. Being hopelessly deluded, there is also a decent ending, a problem faced by far too many novels (and films). All too often, everything is very neatly tied up rendering the resolution unbelievable. Also, far too many stories/plots have a weak ending because decent conclusions are not easy to concoct. No cheap tricks here. When it comes to real life, a person’s experience starts and ends long before and after the period over which the story has been told. The Distortion Diaries covers a defined short period of time in the much longer lives of these 8+ defective characters, so don’t expect perfection. You’ll have to work for satisfaction and fulfilment, but not too hard.

Again, being vain and conceited, I was very surprised that it actually seems to work as a whole and I actually enjoyed reading it while also working on it. I hope that’s a good sign.

“I want to get better at life and then maybe life will get better for me” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)

I also have far more material than the story warrants. This provides a great opportunity to ‘overdo’ it and then to execute a brutal edit to leave the strongest core possible. Only then, I hope, will the final cut be robust enough to stand up to scrutiny.

Another positive is that it doesn’t seem to be overly derivative. Yes, there are universal truths about the human condition that have been covered in infinite variety over centuries (and therefore unavoidable here), so it cannot possibly be classified as original or unique. However, I believe it is a fairly fresh approach that doesn’t stick to every storytelling rule that has been complied with before.

While there is little scope for a sequel (or prequel), there are opportunities for a couple of spin‑off stories with which my feeble grey matter has been toying. These ideas are not about Terry but other strange and very different fables. I won’t contemplate putting finger to keyboard on any of those until this one had been done to death. The curse of a fickle creative mind. A lot will depend on how ‘successful’ The Distortion Diaries is, when it has finally been concluded.

“The second best thing that can happen to a man is a good woman. The best that can happen to a man, however, is a bad woman. The worst thing that can happen to a man is no woman” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


The Not So Good News about ‘The Distortion Diaries’

Principally, the project has taken far too long to bring to fruition, which has been a constant frustration over the months. The gestation period has become tiresome, as it isn’t my ‘day job’. This isn’t because of lack of enthusiasm or interest; it has been a purely practical failing on my part to prioritise it sufficiently in the face of other unavoidable responsibilities.

I have now accepted that it is a slow process and have become less anxious about progress. It will take its own time and it will probably be better for it. I cannot afford the mental stress of pressuring myself to do it quicker. Better late than never, as ‘they’ say.

Then there are the practical hurdles. An independent editor would no doubt improve the end product. However, I do not want anyone else to change anything. I do not want it to be perfectly polished. I actually want it to be rough around the edges. I don’t want it to be like every other highly processed piece of prose. I want my own mistakes to be present in it; the many apparent flaws are an integral part of its charm, just as a genuine journal would be. These are imperfect people and they should be seen distorted through Terry’s defective lens. I want it to come across as if Terry had actually lived to tell his tale his way. I do not know of a single genuine diary or journal that has been crawled over by editors and proof readers to eradicate inconsistencies and errors. It is a bit like museum grade vintage guitars, something can be ‘too good’ to enjoy.

Another hurdle is self‑publication. I have absolutely no idea how to go about it. I have limited funds, so I cannot pay for someone to do it on my behalf. I also do not want to go through the ordeal of pleading to agents for attention with the associated high risk of rejection – my fragile ego couldn’t cope being subject to the critical whims of others not invested in the project. Neither do I want the end product to be managed beyond my ability to influence the outcome. As a bit of a control freak (Ed: No kidding!), I don’t appreciate being beholden to anyone else. Such interference is simply unacceptable to me. I really do not give a damn about what agents, publishers and editors think. They can make their parasitical living off someone else. I only care what I think and what genuine readers might think, warts ‘n’ all.

So, even if I get over the hurdle of writing, editing, agents and publishing, then there are the formidable challenges of printing, marketing, distribution, sales and promotion. Everything about the whole process is set against this being any sort of success, regardless of any literary merit. Even if it is a worthy story, it could fail at any of these key points.

The Distortion Diaries is a personal folly and commercial success is not a prerequisite for a satisfactory outcome. If only one or two people read it and get some ephemeral pleasure from it, I shall be content. My aspirations in this regard are very modest and humble. A bit like my ambitions for CRAVE Guitars as an undertaking.

As previously mentioned, I did toy with the idea of serialising The Distortion Diaries on the CRAVE Guitars’ web site. However, it wouldn’t really work and it would blur the lines between the two discrete ‘projects’. The novel’s material is also not appropriate for a vintage guitar showcase. So, that is not gonna happen. Decided.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had my heart broken. It really doesn’t sound like it’s something I’d want to try out” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


Final Thoughts about ‘The Distortion Diaries’

You may have gathered that I remain excited about this particularly narcissistic venture. The fact that the enthusiasm has endured since December 2023 without waning in the slightest suggests that there is something worth pursuing. I remain concerned about two things. The first I have mentioned many times, which is making sufficient time and space to complete the writing process. Put simply, the more time I spend on article writing, the less time there is for The Distortion Diaries. The second, as mentioned above, is the complications of getting the final product out there for people to judge. In these technological days, it really should be simpler.

One thing I am absolutely certain about is that this is not a literary masterpiece. It will not be ‘a great British novel’. Neither will it be a monotonous churning out of tedious, derivative drivel (Ed: Are you sure about that?). It was never intended to be an exemplar of literary excellence and that has not changed. However, it is a heartfelt and genuine attempt to be a bit different and to produce something that may be of moderate interest to others. While it breaks many rules, it isn’t revolutionary. It is what it is, an earnest first attempt.

I have mentioned before, and need to reiterate now, that this dedicated ‘labour of love’ (NB. an idiom that has been used to describe various forms of artistic expressions. Its first appearance in English was in the King James Bible, published in 1611, although it may have originated in pre‑medieval times), is NOT autobiographical. It is, though, impossible not to draw, and to isolate the final product, from one’s own life experiences.

Another thing about writing this month’s article was, once again, to test the waters, to challenge my own notions and to reinforce my beliefs about whether this is something I want to dedicate a serious amount of time to. The act of writing about it is, in itself, a reality check and I am pleased to say that it has passed scrutiny without serious mishap (so far). I am still reticent and uncertain about how to turn a good intention into a great reality.

One might wonder why I want to publish a fiction novel in the first place. That’s a difficult question to answer. None of the oft‑used reasons – and there may be dozens of them – resonate with me, such as a desire for storytelling, personal growth, confidence building, compulsion, social impact, sharing, competitiveness, proving something, self‑learning, self‑aggrandisement, income, attention seeking, legacy, etc. Quite simply, it is something that I would like to do. Simples.

Bottom line. Will it ever see the light of day? I hope so, ceteris paribus, but probably not. This article is intended to commit myself to completing the process to the best of my ability or I will look like a complete dumbass for boasting about it and then not delivering. Wish me luck.

If, perchance, it was ever made into a film, the location could conceivably be relocated to somewhere, say, in New England (comprising, Connecticut, Maine, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Rhode Island and Vermont).

“The confusing interplay of human emotions and motives – when you think about it – is magnificently messy and chaotic, not at all organised or logical, it is an unreality existing in an artificially real world. There is no universal harmony in life’s experience” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’

Given the subject matter this month, we have to delve into the creative aspects of Terry and his bandmates aspirations. During that fateful year of 2012, The Imaginary Transtemporal Affair (TITA) was working hard on live performance and recording ideas for the first of many albums that they intend to define their career. Entirely a fictional construct, this month’s distorted accolade goes to…

The Imaginary Transtemporal Affair – TITA Om Fyah (2012): The ill‑fated debut studio album from The Imaginary Transtemporal Affair has never been released on TITA Records, although the material exists and the artwork completed (see below). Comprising eight tracks over 72 minutes, the atmospheric aural adventures of unrealised potential evoke a mantra of melancholy and a more than a trace of transcendence. The epic ‘everything lasts for never’ (track 5, running time 6:41) is a firm band and fan favourite. File under HMSPGSALFGGSR music.

If only I had the talent, motivation, drive, skills and time to concoct this album for real, I would do it without hesitation. I wouldn’t change the band name, album title or track list one iota (NB. No, not the 9th letter of the Greek alphabet). It would be great – I have to believe that. For now, progressing the novel is the main focus. One day, maybe the music behind it will be realised. I have a futile fantasy that someone will pick up the book and make it into a film and this album would become the original soundtrack to the movie. Now, precisely where is that fateful Crossroads that blues guitarist Robert Johnson famously made a deal with the devil? In the meantime, while I still have a soul, I can dream.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“The earworm rented out the vacant lot in my brain’s auditory processing, easier to put on repeat than shuffle” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)


Tailpiece

Once again, I have regressed into writing about writing, for which I apologise post hoc. While I am genuinely enthusiastic by this egocentric recklessness, I can readily understand why it might be too far off the well‑trod vintage guitar topic to be of interest for CRAVE Guitars’ readers. Further obsequious apologies. Even I need a break from vintage guitars once in a while.

As Terry remarks in, ‘The Distortion Diaries’, “I am only superficial on the surface after all”.

For now, I seem to have run out of ideas for next month’s article but I’m sure I’ll come up with something to distract me from reality for a few minutes. In the meantime, a final word or thirty from ‘The Distortion Diaries’ sagacious hero…

“Engaging with Women of the opposite Sex is a bit like engaging an enemy in strategic warfare. It seems I don’t have even a modest grasp of basic battlefield tactics” – Terry (The Distortion Diaries)

For once, CRAVE Guitars’ regular ‘Quote of the Month’ (see below) is extremely relevant to the ambitious subject matter of the main article. I do hope you’ve enjoyed this minor detour in the course of unreal life and that you will come back and ‘see’ me again sometime soon.

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. The CRAVEman, signing off. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “The finish line may be in sight but is it within reach?”

© 2025 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


 

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July 2025 – The CRAVEman Cometh

Prelude

GRACIOUS GREETINGS FROM YOUR HUMOROULSY HEARTY HOST. Yup. Welcome once again to a freshly minted monthly monologue for late July, high summer in the northern hemispherical portion of our little floating blue sphere. This month is something entirely new (and therefore, by inference, different), as well as a tad flippant. I thought you might like to know a little bit more about the character behind the CRAVE Guitars brand – the founder, owner, proprietor, curator, manager, roadie, mail man, web designer, social media guru, lackey and tea boy. Well, tough, I aim to remain firmly in the background, anonymous and intentionally inscrutable, letting the vintage guitar gear stand proud, front and centre, just it should.

“Everyone needs something to aim for. You can call it a challenge, or you can call it a goal. It is what makes us human. It was challenges that took us from being cavemen to reaching for the stars” – Richard Branson (1950‑)

In my May article, I briefly perplexed about a collective noun for vintage guitar collecting, collectors and vintage guitars. I then suggested that, perhaps, it is time for someone to create a name for vintage guitar collectors, suggesting, somewhat whimsically but definitely not seriously, CRAVE‑o‑holic or CRAVE‑o‑phile? CRAVE‑atalist or CRAVE‑ologist maybe? No? How about Cuitarchivist, Guitarcheologist, Guitarchitect? NB. Full disclosure: admittedly those last three were not my ideas – credit goes to the originators for getting there before me. While that topic isn’t the subject of this month’s article, it did provide some fondly flirtatious food for thought.

However, the thought of an extension of CRAVE Guitars tenacious tentacles into new nooks and crannies occurred to my feeble brainium and led, rather circuitously, to this month’s subject matter. (NB. ‘Nook and cranny’ is a medieval English idiom when castles were built with hidden passages and secret rooms. People would search for small spaces, hiding places or escape routes concealed within castle walls.)

I thought this month’s article would be mercifully brief so that I could concentrate on ‘The Distortion Diaries’. However, as usual, I got distracted by the subject matter and progress on the novel has been slower than article preparation. Sigh.

“Everything has changed, but the process of telling a story has not changed. It’s like cavemen sitting around the fire; somebody’s going to tell the story. Somebody is drawing on the wall. You’re communicating. You’re trying to learn and teach at the same time. You’re your own student and you’re your own teacher, but the process is of the communicating” – Stanley Kubrick (1928‑1999)


Introducing… The CRAVEman Cometh

Prepare your souls for flowery prose. Taking a tangential turn, this month I am introducing my avatar, my double, my alter ego, my twin, my clone, my doppelgänger, my alternate personality (or at least one of them). So, without further ado, it’s time to say “hi” to ‘el jefe’, the prehistorically‑minded guitar‑wielding (axe‑wielding?) titular representative and future front man for CRAVE Guitars; ‘The CRAVEman’. Geddit?

These vestigial thoughts conveniently coincided with a humorous and harmonious messaging exchange with a close friend and the idea of The CRAVEman came to the fore. It was not so much an epiphany, more a lucid realisation that I could justifiably BE someone else, just for CRAVE Guitars’ expanding brand image. Much more interesting than the prospect of boring reality, eh?

“This is a story of long, long ago, when the world was just beginning… A young world, a world early in the morning of time. A hard, unfriendly world. Creatures who sit and wait. Creatures who must kill to live. And man, superior to the creatures only in his cunning” – Narrator from the motion picture, ‘One Million Years B.C.’ (1966)

The CRAVEman moniker wasn’t intended to describe a collective noun, particularly as it is used in the singular, traditionally gender bipartite fashion (apologies to the politically correct woke). However, he was created figuratively to take on the role as your esteemed narrator of CRAVE Guitar blog articles. Thus, a fantastical formulation of an indulgent irrational idea coalesced into coherency.

“There are not many men yet. Just a few tribes scattered across the wilderness. Never venturing far, unaware that other tribes exist even. Too busy with their own lives to be curious. Too frightened of the unknown to wander. Their laws are simple: the strong take everything” – Narrator from the motion picture, ‘One Million Years B.C.’ (1966)

Now, for the avid musicologists out there, the word ‘Craveman’ (note the lack of the definite article and the traditional form of capitalisation) has been used previously (see ‘CRAVE Guitars’ Album of the Month’ below). However, this article’s particular incarnation is, I believe, sufficiently differentiated and unique enough to be adopted legitimately by CRAVE Guitars.

“Visual storytelling of one kind or another has been around since cavemen were drawing on the walls” – Frank Darabont (1959‑)


Evolution of The CRAVEman Cometh

While my true identity remains vehemently enigmatic, I am happy to hide behind a virtual caricature. While I may generally portray myself as a contemporary, relatively evolved metrosexual (male) human bean, the vaguely humorous play on words refers not only to CRAVE Guitars but also to Homo Sapien’s genetic Palaeolithic ancestors. Just for clarification, I don’t believe that I conform to the stereotypical Stone Age clichés of a prehistoric caveman (with or without a guitar). Grunt!

“Nnn?” – The character Loana played by Raquel Welch in the motion picture, ‘One Million Years B.C.’ (1966)

However, it can be amusing to conform to or to subvert stereotypes, if only to reinforce prejudicial preconceptions. Grunt! I have to state for the record, that The CRAVEman is a loving, peaceful individual, reticent to engage in aggression, thus representing an archetype for a semi‑civilised new age Stone Age hippy. He may even partake of a little bud from the flowering plant, Cannabis sativa for an occaional chill out. Legend. He doesn’t need a spear or a club, just one of his many trusty CRAVE Guitars and a healthy respect for his environment. Grunt! (Ed: OK, we get the idea, move on)

“I think that weddings have probably been crashed since the beginning of time. Cavemen crashed them. You go to meet girls. It makes sense” – Christopher Walken (1943‑)


The use of AI for The Craveman Cometh

As you may know, CRAVE Guitars has dabbled with the subject of artificial intelligence (AI) before. For background information, CRAVE Guitars’ focused on AI generally and in relation to vintage guitars last year (2024). A bit has changed over the course of 12+ months. If you wish to view or review the material, follow the links below (each link opens in a new tab):

March 2024 – Artificial Intelligence takes on Vintage Guitars: Part I
April 2024 – Artificial Intelligence takes on Vintage Guitars: Part II
May 2024 – Artificial Intelligence takes on Vintage Guitars: Part III

While this article is principally about The CRAVEman, the use of AI to illustrate him is simply a convenient means to the storytelling end. The short video clip of The CRAVEman (see below) is also my first venture into AI video. Good to know that the technology is being used for altruistically enhancing human civilisation, eh?

The upside is that there are plenty of images this month. While I consider myself a reasonably creative character, my artistic skills remain woefully under‑developed, so I admit that I resorted to AI image generation for the majority of visual representations this month. Apologies to all genuine artists out there, I simply can’t afford your authenticity. While the images look very much of their type (still not convinced), they serve a specific purpose here, to conjure up and to evoke The CRAVEman avatar in the collective consciousness within the growing CRAVE Guitars virtual space (Ed: The CRAVEverse then?). Time to stop with the prosaic narrative and enter CRAVEworld. Ready or not, here he is (finally), The CRAVEman Cometh.

“Women love hairy men. Cavemen were the sexiest men in history” – Leslie Mann (1972‑)


The Adventures of the CRAVEman Cometh

On this occasion folks, I am going to let you, the reader(s), do the hard work for once. Also unusually, the majority of this article is pictorial and the ‘story’, as such, is essentially just a series of captions for you to use your imagination and fill in the intentional blanks.

To set the scene, I may need to suggest a bit of factual context about the world within which The CRAVEman might exist. This is necessary if only to provide a rich background stage on which he can perform his adventures for you.

“Captain CAAAAAVEMANNNN!” – Captain Caveman (animated character voiced by Mel Blanc, 1977‑1980)

Imagine the life and times of The CRAVEman in the Upper Palaeolithic Era (c.50,000‑9,600BCE), which was notable for its significant increase in the diversity and complexity of community organisation. It also saw the emergence of artistic endeavour, such as cave paintings and carvings, indicating a marked development in primitive culture beyond the immediate necessities of survival.

Early humans primarily lived as nomadic hunter‑gatherers. They relied on hunting wild animals and gathering edible plants, both of which required a good understanding of their surroundings. The roaming lifestyle of social groups was essential, as they followed animal migrations, seasonal plant growth and climate.

Nascent human societies were typically organised in small groups or bands, with a relatively simple division of labour. Men often hunted for food and defended their group, while women gathered plants and cared for children. Resources were shared communally, as part of a generally egalitarian but still hierarchical paternalistic social structure.

The development of basic tools included the use of materials like bone, antler and stone, which became crucial for survival. Tools were used for various tasks, including butchering animals, cutting plants and crafting other implements. The mastery of fire also began to play a significant part in daily life, providing warmth, protection and a means to cook food. The Palaeolithic (the Old Stone Age) was followed by the Mesolithic and Neolithic (Middle and New Stone Ages respectively) periods, characterised by the development of permanent settlements, the rise of agriculture and the domestication of animals.

“Man is a tool-using animal. Without tools he is nothing, with tools he is all” – Thomas Carlyle (1795‑1881)

Now for the small but essential matter of the suspension of disbelief. Please bear with me while I veer away from verisimilitude. The premise is a blatant, intentionally clumsy and cartoonish cultural and chronological clash (Ed: alliteration abounds!). The plucky, fantastical CRAVEman collects and plays (electric) guitars (now vintage of course)! He also plays in a rock (sic!) band. Sadly for him, he doesn’t seem to have a CRAVEwife, or CRAVEgirlfriend (yet), not even a CRAVEgroupie or three. Just don’t ask too many awkward questions about coherence or attempt to rationalise the incongruities, ignored here for artistic license – just go with the flow and use your imagination. Get the general idea though? G‑G‑g‑great! Let’s get stoned (sic!).

Think of the pictorial sequence as a chronologically linear ‘storyline’ progression, whether portraying a day, a week, a month, a year, etc. and you begin to get the CRAVEworld concept (Ed: time to record a prog album?). When following The Adventures of The CRAVEman Cometh, think along the lines of comic strip panels minus the unnecessary narrative ‘speech bubbles’ – well, our prehistoric ancestors’ vocabulary was a bit, erm, stunted, at best. I’m sure you can apply the occasional, “grunt!” if you wish to supplement the visuals with auditory accents. Alternatively, the following could be thought of as a rough storyboard outline for a motion picture film screenplay (if only).

The opportunities for The CRAVEman imaginings are boundless. I wish I had the time, effort and genuine creativity to make a proper ‘thing’ of this particular spinoff. Remember though that The CRAVEman Cometh and his story is now undeniably CRAVE Guitars’ IP.

“I work hard all day, too, and what do I get? A lot of yak from you. You at least get out everyday, see things, talk to people. I never get out of this cave” – Wilma Flintstone from ‘The Flintstones’ (1960‑1966)


A Day/Week/Month/Year in the Life of The CRAVEman

About time too! Let us prevaricate, procrastinate, beat about the bush, dilly dally, delay and obfuscate no longer. We are about to embark on the positively pulchritudinous prehistoric adventures of The CRAVEman. Settle in and enjoy.

New Dawn Sunrise – Having recently roused from his Stone Age slumbers, dreams of being a Rock God left long behind, The CRAVEman looks out upon CRAVEworld, his immense territorial domain as the sun rises on a shiny brand new day. It looks promising weather for undertaking his intended tasks for the day ahead. His role is to ensure his tribe’s survival in a testing world.


Neighbourly Greeting – Prior to heading out on his daily mission, he engages amiably with his thriving social group. Relationships are largely cordial, marred only by lusty competition for unattached CRAVEgirls. The CRAVEman agrees the imperatives and priorities for the day’s assignment.


Ready To Head Out – Having readied himself for his daily quest, The CRAVEman mentally prepares himself for whatever challenges he is likely to face in the wilderness. A moment of serious reflection taken as he formulates a basic plan to make the most of the opportunities available to him.


Outbound Commute – Having long since exhausted all available resources close to home, The CRAVEman has to travel further afield to find what he and his group needs. Fortunately, his domesticated heavy horse makes crossing distance and uneven terrain easier. His faithful hound accompanies him.


Rocky Mountain Way Snowy Explorer – On a lengthy expedition, The CRAVEman has to cross a challenging and unfamiliar landscape including hostile snow and ice high up in the mountains. The grunting weather is severe. Unsure what he might find, he sets out on foot to explore.


Fishing in Bear Country – After the mountain pass, The CRAVEman descends into a valley carved out by river erosion, He attempts to use his crude tools to catch any fish that may swim past, taking care to avoid other predators after the same quarry in this area of nutritional abundance. Grunting bears!


Mammoth Hunting on the Plain – Having not caught much in the way of fish from the river valley, The CRAVEman heads out onto the plains in the hope of hunting larger game. The massive mammoths he encounters are more than he can take on alone. Onward he goes, leaving the prospect of grunting mammoth steaks for another day.


Faraway Foraging in the Grassland – Having been unsuccessful hunting fish and animal prey on the plains, The CRAVEman resorts to the grasslands on the edge of ancient woodland to forage for edible plants and berries to take back to his kinfolk. He cannot go home empty handed.


Defending the Tribe – Every so often, The CRAVEman’s group encounters other tribes, each determined to defend their own territory. Rarely do these grunting confrontations end in conflict. There is plenty of posturing and shows of power intended to sustain a status quo. Occasionally, tribes come together for competitive but friendly rock band competitions.


Homebound Commute – After a long day’s travails exploring in the mountains, fishing in river valleys, hunting on the plains, foraging in grassland and defending his community from interlopers, a weary The CRAVEman heads homeward on his trusty heavy horse with his faithful dog in close pursuit.


Cooking Pot Blues – Having secured enough food for his contribution to his community’s sustenance, The CRAVEman prepares and cooks his own meal. He would have preferred a meatier and tastier menu but grunting plant food will have to do on this occasion. A tad disappointed, he plays a lugubrious lament while waiting for his supper to stew.


Rock Guitar Practice – Knowing that he has some serious performance time ahead of him, The CRAVEman cannot let up on practicing his hard rock music chops. It takes all his concentration to keep his musical talents up to scratch.


Big Cat Interruption – What the grunt! No peace for the wicked. The CRAVEman’s guitar practice is rudely interrupted by a familiar local big kitty. He may look fearsome but that is just playful exuberance. There is mutual benefit to the tribe and their ‘pet’ feline’s informal collaboration.


Rock Guitar Practice Resumed – Having settled the big kitty down for a cat nap, The CRAVEman can resume his studious guitar practice in readiness for a forthcoming rock gig. More hard work. The demands and burdens of a Stone Age Rock God never ceases.


Rock Band Rehearsal – Having been through his intensive practice regime, The CRAVEman sets about gathering his rock band members together for an impromptu rock & rock rehearsal. Unrealised aspirations of Rock Godness abound and rehearsals go well, if a bit chaotic. Lyrics are certainly not their strong point! Grunt!


Rock Festival Rain – For grunt’s sake! It had to happen, The CRAVEman’s band gets to play an outdoor gig and it grunting well rains on them mid performance, thinning what little crowd they had gathered to listen and appreciate his guitar playing skills. A typical rock festival experience over the ages. A veritable Stone Age Glastonbury experience. Grunting bad weather.


Cave Painting – In order to commemorate The CRAVEman’s contribution to his small community, the local rock ‘journalist’ does his best as a pictographic designer. He poses while the artist attempts to immortalise the would‑be rock legend in a cave painting. Like lyric writing, our merry group’s portrait skills leave something to be desired.


Over The Sea and Far Away Sunset – At long last, The CRAVEman’s long and arduous day draws closer to its inevitable conclusion. He’s up on a nearby cliff admiring CRAVEworld’s beautiful sunset over the infinite sea. The preternatural landscape inspires The CRAVEman to compose his next rock song.


Campfire Singalong – Although darkness has settled on the Stone Age camp, The CRAVEman’s musical skills are still much in need by his loyal troupe. He sits contentedly around the campfire grunting rock lullabies for a period of important social bonding between genders and generations.


Fireside Rock Jam – Once the rock kids have gone to their caves for night time slumbers, The CRAVEman continues his musical explorations. No more intense solo practice, band rehearsal or campfire lullabies, this is pure rock music noodling for his own pleasure. Jamming for fun helps him to unwind before retiring for the night.


Dreaming of Stone Age Rock Godness – Finally laying his weary head down to rest, The CRAVEman falls into a deep sleep with his favourite axe and his faithful canine companion both by his side. He dreams of becoming an eternal Rock God, immortalised forever for his contributions to Stone Age rock & rock music. Dream on.

Well there you have him – The CRAVEman’s first adventures in CRAVEworld in a proverbial nutshell. Short and sweet. If you don’t dig The CRAVEman’s adventures, that’s fine.

“Yabba Dabba Doo!” – Fred Flintstone from the first episode of ‘The Flintstones’, ‘The Flintstone Flyer’ (1960)


Final Thoughts on The CRAVEman Cometh

A quick rhetorical question, why didn’t this preposterous notion occur to me before now? The simple answer is that, in hindsight, I really don’t know. Nevertheless, I feel obliged at this particular juncture to restate that this month’s article is only a bit of puerile FUN and a break from the more serious ‘business‑as‑usual’ task of writing about vintage guitars. Heck, we all have to set loose our inner hirsute hero from time to time (NB. from time to time is an English idiom dating back to at least the 16th Century, meaning intermittently/occasionally). On this occasion, the author’s mental aberration has played out in the public domain. As usual, if you don’t like what you see here, there are plenty of other places that are after a temporal slice of your precious life.

My intention is not to require a following but to welcome those who wish to participate actively in something occasionally a little bit odd (?!). Life would be very dull without a degree of dalliance with the deviant (as long as it is harmless of course). Disclaimer, no animals (extinct or surviving) were harmed during the making of The Adventures of The CRAVEman Cometh.

“If there hadn’t been women we’d still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends” – Orson Welles (1915‑1985)

You may wonder what all this has to do with vintage guitars. Fair comment. Well, it is relevant by association. There would be no The CRAVEman without CRAVE Guitars and there would be no CRAVE Guitars without vintage guitars and its increasingly peculiar proprietor. Being quite frank (poor Frank comes in for a lot of stick, don’t you think?), I just cannot be bothered to justify this devious detour any further. It is what it is, like it or not. I kinda dig The CRAVEman dude, hence his appearance. Looking back, I still wonder why it took so long.

“Grunt!” – The CRAVEman (The Upper Palaeolithic, c.50,000‑9,600BCE)

Whether this little existential experiment bears further fruit, one can only speculate at this stage. He may return to obscurity or he may flourish in abundance. All is up for grabs at the moment. I kinda think he might stick around. He may even appear at a CRAVErock‑gig or CRAVErock‑festival near, where else, Stonehenge. He may even go CRAVEbusking at a stone circle near you.

“The first human being who hurled an insult instead of a stone was the founder of civilization” – Sigmund Freud (1856‑1939)

Is there any profound meaning or ancestral resemblance between The CRAVEman and me? Personally, I do not believe so, which makes him all the more endearing – he is not bound in any way by my ephemeral mortal manifestation. Put bluntly, I am (we are) perfectly comfortable and at ease with multiple identities – no mental disorder involved, honest. Seriously, for a moment though, look after your mental health and well‑being good people. This article has not featured any images of actual vintage guitars so, finally, here is a complimentary pic of The CRAVEman with his own CRAVE Guitars collection…


The Real CRAVE Cave

After reading all this, one might think that it is 100% fiction. However, there is an itsy‑bitsy, teeny‑weeny, tiny trace of truth behind an element of the story. The CRAVEman‑cave does actually exist. Kinda. The dark, damp, dilapidated cellar of the domestic house is the would‑be home for today’s actual CRAVE Guitars family.

Regular readers will know that this has been a long‑gestating project to ‘tank’ the cellar to create a dry, warm and secure home for vintage gear. Progress has been hindered by access, technical issues and, the big, big biggy, lack of funds. So there you go, there is a smidgeon of veracity to the story. The above is the real thing, No AI this time.

“Once you were apes, yet even now man is more of an ape than any of the apes” – Friedrich Nietzsche (1844‑1900)


CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Album of the Month’

Given this month’s reveal of the author’s newly assumed nom de guerre, ‘The CRAVEman’, it seemed appropriate that this month’s ‘Album of the Month’ should reflect an LP with an analogous title. I should emphasise here that there is no connection between CRAVE Guitars and the name of the album or its artist; it is merely coincidental and totally unintentional. However, there is no reason why this convenient happenstance should be overlooked for this article.

Ted Nugent – Craveman’ (2002): Ted Nugent’s 12th studio album, ‘Craveman’ was released in September 2002 on Spitfire Records. The album comprises 14 tracks over 56 minutes. Even the 2nd track is titled, ‘Crave’, lasting a monumental 6 minutes 19 seconds. Perhaps he knew I was coming! The album represents Nugent’s return to the power trio format and a more hard rock sound than previous outings. It was released five years before CRAVE Guitars became a ‘thing’ and twenty three years before The CRAVEman, so I guess he got there first.

Ted Nugent’s ‘Craveman’ is not my favourite guitar album but it’s OK I guess. However, it fits the bill for this illustrative purpose. At least it is a heavier, guitar‑centric rock album after unconvincing periods of synth pop/rock ballad material.

The music is one thing. The character behind it is another. There is no way to avoid the association. Nugent’s music will always be overshadowed by his political notoriety. There is no denying that Nugent is a controversial larger‑than‑life, take‑it‑or‑leave‑it personality and also a pretty good guitarist to boot.

Full disclosure; I have to state that and I do not agree with Mr Nugent’s political alignments, his racial stances, his propensity for gun ownership and his predisposition for slaughtering innocent animals for ‘fun’. In 2021, he stepped down from the board of directors of the NRA (the American National Rifle Association gun rights advocacy and lobby group that campaigns in defence of the USA’s out‑dated second amendment). Owning a gun is one thing, using it as a lethal weapon to kill living creatures is another. This is not an expression of any sort of liberal woke agenda, it is just a heartfelt compassion and an expression of respect for all life on our planet.

BELIEVE IN MUSIC!

“The human failing I would most like to correct is aggression. It may have had survival advantage in caveman days, to get more food, territory or a partner with whom to reproduce, but now it threatens to destroy us all” – Stephen Hawking (1942‑2018)


Tailpiece

Well that was fun and insane in equal measure! Dumbass? Has CRAVE lost his final marble? Too much? Maybe. Maybe not. You decide. So we bid au revoir, adios, ciao and garrulous grunts from ‘The CRAVEman’ for now. Time for The CRAVEman Goeth, so to speak. I have a funny feeling that he may well return at some point in some guise or other. To mix metaphors, there is no turning back now as the genie is out of the bottle. You have been warned. A final thought… fundamentally, aren’t we all just cave men and cave women with fancy modern lifestyle trappings? Grunt!

Ultimately, as stated above, this month’s article is all just a bit of silly FUN and (at least for me) a welcome break from the norm. As a terribly telegraphed trifling tip‑off, the fictional fancies herein may just beckon a peripheral subject matter for next month’s article. So let’s wish our precious lives away and bring on August 2025 to wait and see what transpires. At the top of the article, I promised you flowery language. I think that promise was delivered in spades (NB. Another 20th Century English idiom probably referring to the spades in a pack of cards, the dominant suit used in contract bridge. It means for something to be done beyond the norm).

Let us hope we survive long enough to endure the preposterous perils of perverted, paranoid power crazed people. Civilisation and our precious planet have been irrevocably scarred under the pretext of ‘progress’ and unconscionable conflict. Sadly. When will the moral majority stand up collectively to the corrupted and say, “no more!” before it is too late? It cannot come too soon. Apologies, didactic discourse for the month over… for now.

Truth, peace, love, and guitar music be with you always. Until next time…

CRAVE Guitars’ ‘Quote of the Month’: “They say only time will tell. When that time comes, will there be anyone around to listen?”

© 2025 CRAVE Guitars – Love Vintage Guitars.


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